Disheartened

I feel like my baby doesn’t know or feel me. He born at 29w3d stayed in hospital until 36. I went to hospital for skin to skin , he’s on breast milk from day 2 of his life. He’s turning 3 months actual age now and behaves exactly the same with me, my mom and dad. I try to give cuddles, skin to skin and even working on latch 2-3 times a day. But I don’t see or feel anything from him. It just makes me so sad.

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My baby wasn’t in nicu as long as that, but she was the same until around 4 months where she will smile more for me and my husband now compared to anyone else. She looks for us wherever we go. Including my own mother who looks after our baby alongside me. Your baby will do that soon too I’m sure x

It’s hard to think and wonder if our baby knows us because of that time apart… but they do ❤️

Right now he’s technically like a week or 2 old developmentally. He’s not going to show preference with his facial features or by facial recognition right now. Does he seem more calm when you hold him? When he cries are you able to settle him easier? My son was born 30+2, came home 36+1, is now 40+1. Even though he’s 10 weeks on Friday, he’s 1 day old developmentally so he can’t show preference by smiling and such. He does show preference by settling easier when he’s with me and being more calm with me.

My baby didn't need the NICU, but still behaved like this for a while! I don't think it's necessary anything to do with separation or early gestation, more just a baby thing!

I also felt disheartened at the beginning. It is more difficult for us as we have additional new born time. But all babies don't show attachment until they are about 6 months. Now mine is 8 months corrected (10 months actual) and she loves being with me and doesn't like strangers. This has its pros and cons. Give it time and your baby will show you so much love. They will cry when held by others and be calm with you only. This is a wonderful feeling and trust me it will come x

It gets better with time, my baby mostly wants me around her now she’s going to be 6m corrected

My baby was 29w also and in nicu 4m. I sometimes felt that way especially since the nurses did so much of her care for so long. But your boy is so young, barely even a newborn corrected so he isn't likely very aware yet! Give it time and lots of snuggles and he will bond to you. Before you know it you'll be hearing cries for "mamama" in the middle of the night and any time he bumps his head.

My daughter was the same until about 8 months, she's 18 months now and little mummy's girl most of the time. She's still not super cuddly - until it comes to doing things that she doesn't want to do and uses cuddles as a way to delay them... But now she can move and speak she shows it through her actions.

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