Housework??

Hey all! So I just gave birth 11 days ago to my second baby. Am I okay to do housework? I keep thinking I’m doing too much just by doing the dishes or something. My house is a wreck and I hate sitting still. I know I still need to rest but mentally I can’t. My husband works super long hours and I don’t really have a support system to help me with anything. I just don’t know if doing the bare minimum is still too hard on my body.

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That’s probably okay. Just don’t do any heavy lifting. If you start hurting or anything, take a break. Try not to stand too long.

I did house work the day after and was okay just do not push yourself, you just gave birth no one will care if your house is a lil messy only do what you think you can do

If you feel up to it, go for it! But you have to know that housework is not a must especially when healing

I was told after giving birth not too so any heavy lifting and if my bleeding gets heavier then I've done too much and need to rest

I found doing too much house work, would increase my bleeding.

literally same.
I felt bad that my husband was doing all the cooking and housework, but every time I tried to help out, I would bleed heavier.
Thankfully he was very understanding and didn't mind or complain (his leave was 2 weeks but continued to so everything for upwards of 3 months cause it was taking forever for me to get back to baseline due to chronic illness)

I had a c section 6 days ago and I’ve been doing light housework to keep on top of it since. Don’t see why you couldn’t do housework after 11 days, as long as not pushing yourself too far and expecting too much. Light chores should be fine though

It is still hard on your body. Doesn’t matter if you’ve given birth many times before or you feel extremely fine. Your pelvic floor and uterus and rest of your body is healing. I would honestly keep it minimal.

I was the same. A mess in my house is a mess in my head I couldn't deal not being able to do anything. And also the same no support system, my family is overseas and my partner works long days. Start small like doing dishes and putting a washing up. I ask my partner to take the rubbish out and on a weekend to vacuum.
When I had a decent sleep at night I skip my midday nap when he sleeps to catch up on household duties, tidieng rooms and every now and then I'll do something like clean the bathroom or wipe out the fridge.

But start doing a little extra little by little. No heavy lifting and if you feel tired or overwhelmed just stop what you're doing and take a break♥️

Do what you feel is not hurting or too uncomfortable

I think I was 14 days post csection and finally cleaned both the upstairs bathrooms cause I couldnt in pregnancy or Id puke 😂 Just take it slow cause afterwards I was SORE

If you feel comfortable doing it, it will be okay. Don’t over exert yourself, and make sure you take time to rest.

in our community

Is it bad of me to think this or no?

My husband has been abroad for work (1 day and exploring for 1 day) for 2 and a half days which means I’ve had both kids (1 year and 4 year old) for 2 and a half days plus cooking, cleaning, taking them to clubs, bedtimes!
He came home late afternoon and said I’m so tired, I just need to chill. I said can you wash up whilst I sort kids dinner out, he said he’ll do it later which means he won’t do it and I’ll end up doing it so I said no do it now please otherwise I’ll end up doing it and he said well you have been home and I’ve been away so you’ve just been relaxing.
Don’t know what planet he is on but having the kids alone for 2.5 days is not relaxing. I was stressed!

When he was away, I did miss him and wanted him to come back but now he’s back, I want him to go away again😂
Is that bad?

Feeding

My son is coming up to five months and I just started giving him oatmeal and rice cereal. When can you start trying veggies or fruits? I only give him the oatmeal or rice cereal once a day right now which is what the paediatrician had said to do. I’m just curious to when anybody tried anything else with their kids cause my son eats a lot of formula and he’s VERY curious when I eat.

Really bothered by this

A friend posted this and it really bothers me because that is exactly how she parents her kid, and it's rather unfortunate because when our kids hang out together, her kid has a meltdown at least 5x within an hour. We have know them for years and it's only gotten worse. My kids will concede to hers, because they don't want to see their friend crying, but it sucks because they give up so much of their toys and enjoyment to keep the peace. We aren't hanging out as much anymore but it's rather sad to think she doesn't intervene more in her child tantrums and just let's it slide

Is this normal

Let’s say you’re at a softplay with your 2 year old, and some friends & their toddlers.
You buy your 2 year old a kids meal - chicken nuggets, beans, and chips. They’re very happy with it and have almost eaten it all.
They’re sat at the table, fork in hand, consistently eating, and have one chicken nugget left.
Your adult friend comes over from behind you, picks up the last chicken nugget, and eats it.
There was no indication that your child wasn’t going to eat it, and they didn’t ask. They just took it with no warning and ate it right in front of you and your toddler.
How you reacting?

Shift worker daddies - advice please?

My husband works shifts (6am-6pm days or 6pm-6am nights) so when he’s on shift we either get about an hour or 2 before he goes to work or an hour or 2 when we gets home with him.

I don’t think people who aren’t married/have babies with shift workers fully understand the impact of feeling like a solo parent sometimes.

Does anyone have any advice? I do have parents who can help but I struggle to leave my baby with others as I always feel like they don’t understand the need for tracking wake windows or feeds and our baby will not sleep unless we black out a room or go for a car drive . Everyone seems to think ‘if he’s tired he’ll drop off’ - no he’ll just get overtired and have to then pay for it during his night sleep. So I feel like it’s just easier for me to do it all myself.

When my husbands off work he is great but I do take the mental load of telling him what to do or even reminding him of wake windows etc because he’s not here and forgets routines. He’s also being tested for ADHD currently so there’s that on top of shift work.

Just looking for advice on how to stay sane/keep routines or share loads with shifts workers?

Thank you ❤️

Are these men ok?

I get so sad seeing all the posts on here daily about women dealing with partners who are treating them horribly. I know it seems over represented because those of us with great partners don’t need to write posts asking for help, but I really hope most of us don’t have these kinds of men in our lives!

I tell my husband about these posts I see sometimes and he’s even shocked by some of the things these guys say/do.

Nobody’s perfect, and every relationship takes work. And becoming parents is a stress test unlike any other for sure, but seeing how many women get stuck in these relationships with men who aren’t interested in being better is so so sad😞

But is/was your partner helpful, loving, and supportive during your pregnancy/PP/etc? Was he a wonderful person but changed for the worst after becoming a parent? Has he put effort into becoming the partner you need him to be, even if he struggles?