Shift worker daddies - advice please?

My husband works shifts (6am-6pm days or 6pm-6am nights) so when he’s on shift we either get about an hour or 2 before he goes to work or an hour or 2 when we gets home with him.

I don’t think people who aren’t married/have babies with shift workers fully understand the impact of feeling like a solo parent sometimes.

Does anyone have any advice? I do have parents who can help but I struggle to leave my baby with others as I always feel like they don’t understand the need for tracking wake windows or feeds and our baby will not sleep unless we black out a room or go for a car drive . Everyone seems to think ‘if he’s tired he’ll drop off’ - no he’ll just get overtired and have to then pay for it during his night sleep. So I feel like it’s just easier for me to do it all myself.

When my husbands off work he is great but I do take the mental load of telling him what to do or even reminding him of wake windows etc because he’s not here and forgets routines. He’s also being tested for ADHD currently so there’s that on top of shift work.

Just looking for advice on how to stay sane/keep routines or share loads with shifts workers?

Thank you ❤️

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Honestly my partner is supposed to do 4 on 4 off night shifts but I seem to be alone 24/7🙃 I feel you, I do 100% of the parenting and even have my step daughter too whilst he is working.
My little boy will only contact nap and is just refusing to nap for longer than 10 minutes so trying to get anything done especially when they’re both here can be such a nightmare!
We have a pretty strict feeding schedule, if we don’t adhere to it little man is miserable and his bedtime is thrown off but no one really understands🙃

I could have written this exact post myself - it is alot!

I completely understand this! My partner works a 2 weeks rolling rota, one week he works 3 days then 2 off then the next week he works 7 days and I’m home every day. My parents have my LO once a week but I feel like I’m always explaining the routine I use the huckleberry app and it has helped with understanding his naps - I struggled leaving my LO with my parents because of this exact thing but now we are tracking wake windows etc xx

this sounds like i could have wrote it, right down to the adhd haha

Right there with you. 12 hour day and night shifts. 2 dogs. No support so totally on my own I cry sometimes it's hard to get a rest at all 😭 I just keep myself busy meeting other mums so that I don't go insane

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