Postpartum depression

I’m struggling so bad mentally and I don’t know what to do I don’t know how to explain the feeling except for numb angry and uninterested in everything I can’t bond with my twins or even my toddler anymore I feel so alone and my mom who was supposed to be staying with me and helping me isn’t going to anymore because I won’t leave my fiancé and I have no reason to leave him except for the fact she doesn’t like him anymore for some reason and she has alienated me my fiancé and herself from everybody and it’s not making sense she has turned everyone against everyone and I don’t know why, my fiancé can’t stay with me because of his job and so I’m alone and trying to heal from having a twin vaginaly and from an emergency c section while my twins are in the nicu an hour away I don’t even have a car to go see them and couldn’t even if I wanted to now because I have no one to watch my son and he’s not allowed in the nicu and I’m about to lose my mind there is so much going through my head that I can’t even figure out what’s going on in my head and now every time I pump for the twins I get angry and feel sick and sad and I don’t want to keep doing it but the hospital keeps pressuring me to do it for the twins and I’m just so overwhelmed and don’t know what to do anymore

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Hey beautiful mama out of curiosity do you have people that you can talk to about this? They do recommend that you can call the hotline. I’m definitely more than willing to talk to you about it, but I wanna make sure that you’ve extended those resources first at the end of the day, you’re trying to gather tools to put in your toolbox so that you can fix yourself as you’re healing💕

I definitely know what you mean my husband and my mom have such contention. It’s so frustrating especially because I feel like I have the social enlightenment with birth, but it really is just a manifestation of my postpartum depression and anxiety, ADHDOCD and autism making this nice little cocktail that makes me think I have social employment.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, there is nothing wrong with formula and it sounds like switching to formula might be the best choice for your mental health, which is the most important thing of all. Hang in there mama ❤️

I’m so sorry you’re going thru this. Do you access to social workers or mental health specialist? Now would be a good time to find one and talk this out. I lost my mother to cancer when I was a child and I just had my first baby at 36 years old. I thought losing her was the hardest thing ever but having a baby and not having her is by far harder. Try Rula.com for specialist near you.

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