Sorry for this post, probably wrong place

How would you feel if you didn’t sleep all night because you were breastfeeding baby and in the morning, instead of giving you support, your partner says that probably your milk is not good enough so baby is constantly feeding. Baby is EBF and she is over 15 lbs, not even 4 months yet. I feel like whatever I do is not good enough, I am not good enough, my milk is not good, nothing is good. I am taking care of baby 4 months all by myself.

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This is definitely the right place. I would honestly be upset be very upset if my partner said that You’re good enough it’s hard and it’s honestly a lot of emotions that happens after having a baby. Just know you’re doing an amazing and 15 lbs is an amazing weight. My last baby had reflux and was having a hard time reaching his weight goals. You’re doing wonderful!

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Sounds like you have a very healthy baby on your hands. Which means you are doing enough, your milk is doing wonders, and you are taking care of your baby.

I'm sorry your partner is not being supportive. Especially while we are still recovering hormonally.

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I would be very upset too. You’re doing great mama, if it’s not an everyday thing baby is likely going through a growth spurt or maybe that good ole 4 month sleep regression, if it’s not new then baby will continue to adjust as time goes on, it will get easier and baby sounds healthy either way!

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I had a similar topic with my husband so I did some research to give him a proper response which kept him silent about it ever since. Here some key findings without sources since it’s from the top of my head:
- breastfeeding in the first six months prevents sudden infant death. It’s not fully analyzed why, but it is known that babies don’t sleep as deep and therefore are more likely to wake up when they receive less oxygen or overheat for example. It is believed that the deeper sleep from formula and not yet fully developed lungs can be a cause for it.
- That the baby wakes up more often when breastfed is because the milk is perfectly dosed and the baby drinks more often but a less amount which also leads to a better digestion.
- Giving the baby a bottle of formula before bed time is actually overfeeding the baby and it shouldn’t be our goal to have a baby that sleeps through the night because of above reasons.

Maybe you can read into it yourself a bit. For one to feel stronger a

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About it yourself and secondly to have a good response next time he questions the quality of your breastmilk.

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It happened to me at the beginning, even with having over supply and my partner also thought that my milk cause reflux to my baby, but I was sure that every word he said he just was worrying about our baby and simply he didn’t know nothing, so I explained to him how breastmilk is beneficial for the baby and they have a very tiny stomach and he is supportive since then and in the middle of the night whenever he saw me breastfeeding my baby he gets up and gives me some water.

Men know nothing, I know it’s very upsetting not feeling supported but explain to him and don’t take it personally, it’s a whole new journey for both of you

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I’d be mad 😠
You’re doing more than enough feeding your baby and making sure they are taken care of.
Sounds like he just doesn’t understand the way babies work (even formula fed babies have sleep struggles) so it’s not because your ebf.

But mama you need some sleep! Have you ever considered safe cosleeping? I’ve done it from the beginning and I get at least 6+ hours of sleep at night while ebf.

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I feel like I did not experience the no sleep phase long enough to even complain. That is because I co sleep. My husband has made the same comment before about milk not being quality. I got him together real quick because he knows nothing about a feeding baby. A baby in general he knows nothing. He’s learning every day. So if you love him enough, educate him and move on. You are doing wonderful mama especially if your baby is 15 pounds and not even four months. 🎉 I’m already trying to plan the one year birthday party or even the six month birthday party because that is going to be for me. Period. Reward yourself, Mama👗👜.

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I needed this support s lot! Thank you all so much!♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

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The only one not being "good enoigh" here is your partner. I would be upset. You are doing an amazing job. Using formula does not mean your child will sleep better. I mainly formula feed (like 90% formula 10% breastfeedimg) and my almost 4 month old wakes multiple times a night. This is my second, and honestly, i feel that a lot of these things are just the baby. Many will wake at least once a night, some are up a lot, and some sleep through the night early on. They're all individuals! My first is 5yo and sleeps well now! It does get better!

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