Hello, I’m here as I’m really not sure how to handle this. I recently had my first night away from my baby (6months) and my mum had her at my house for the evening. She told me that my nan would be coming round for dinner so she wasn’t alone all night. Amazing! Have fun!
I have now found out looking at my cameras that it wasn’t just my Nan that came (she has a foster kid/man) that lives with her and he tagged along. Myself and my partner don’t like him and have made it clear that we don’t want him around our baby.
Am I wrong for being upset at my mum and my nan for crossing a line?
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You are definitely right. If you made clear to them that you don't want this guy to be around your baby or don't want to have him at your house, it's on them to respect that. They did use and break your trust by inviting him into your home when you are not around. That's a complete no-go. Shame on them. I mean, you will have your reasons why you don't like him and why you don't want him at your house or near your baby. It's on them to respect that. I would definitely talk to them about it. And if they gaslight you or make you the bad person in that conversation, I would decide on my consequences

You are not wrong at all! They violated your trust by allowing a person you and your partner don't like to come into your home. And on top of that, he was around your baby!
Also, I think it is rude of them to invite someone over when it's not their home. Especially since you don't like this person.
Thanks! My mum came round she said she didn’t think it would be a big deal but knows if it was the other way around she would be angry too so I got a full apology and promise that it won’t happen again🙂

I just want to highlight: on one side, your mum says that she wouldn't have thought it is a big deal but on the other side she said that she would have been angry if it was the other way round and you had invited someone she doesn't like over to her place while she wasn't at home.... Total contradiction in my opinion.
If she thinks something like that is not ok for her then she should also act with the same consideration towards others.