Am I being overly sensitive ?
My baby was born on the 22nd of Jan this year. Via c section. I had to spend most of surgery alone and barely got to see my son as he was rushed to the icy due to severe hypoglycemia. Caused by my heart medications (I didn’t know this was a known risk. Nobody told me not even fetal cardiology) so it was a really scary day. I didn’t know where my partner or my baby was for hours. And I was alone. My parents mum did a Facebook post to announce his birth (after we did) we waited until the Nicu took out his feeding tube and let us dress him and the photos we posted we had all his wires hidden. And we didn’t put anything about the Nicu in the post because it’s private. My partners mum has over 500 friends on Facebook and is a typical “Facebook mum” she posts everything without thinking twice. Her post was one photo. Out of all the ones we sent her. She chose a photo that she took of him the day he was born. The photo was him in his nappy, in his incubator covered head to toe in feeding tubes, drips, monitors. And it still pisses me off that she thought that was okay to post. She even included about him being in the Nicu and coming out of the incubator. It felt like a grab for her wanting the attention. It just wound me up that she’d choose that photo. I didn’t mention it to her but her response was she thought it was a beautiful photo. Sorry ?!! Out of all the others that was your favourite. Our son being covered in wires because he could’ve died. Not the ones of his little face tube free ? Strange. Am I being dramatic ?
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At the end of the day, being in the NICU is part of your son’s story and that’s othing to be ashamed of but she shouldn’t have posted about it though as it’s not her child so it’s not her story to tell.
I would also be pissed off. We’ve decided to have zero social media acknowledgment of our child because I know my mum would be the same. And you have no idea who these people are on her page too. I’d ask her to remove it and simply share the post you created instead.
My 2p - It sounds like you need to speak to your partner about him setting boundaries. If he’s letting her walk all over you it’s gonna get messy with you setting the boundaries. It’s his mum so he should tell her to back off as you 3 need time to bond without extended family members.
I’d also highlight the fact boundaries have already been crossed and not only does it disrespect you but actually risks him. All for their entertainment or “needs”.
You’d rather be a dick and keep him safe than risk his health to keep the peace ♡
Oh. Wow... That sounds like a MIL with self-absorbed narcissistic traits... I am really sorry. U were definitely not overreacting. U're the parents, so u set up the rules and no one else, not even the grandparents.Also they have to follow your rules. I was very firm with my rules when our little boy was born:
No visitors the first 4 weeks
No kisses
No bouncing up and down, just mild swaying
Smokers had to wash their face & hands as well as change their clothes.
No photos on social media at all & no forwarding photos to not immediate family members. (I don't want random people that I don't know to have photos of my baby)
Everyone not following those rules were not allowed to get close to the baby. Bad luck.
My MIL was the only one gaslighting us for the rules & not respecting them. Then she complained that she feels "overlooked" all the time. Luckily my partner knows his mother is a narcissist & he stood up for me & our son, putting her in her place. Of course, she created a drama not worth seeing 🙄
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