cheating dream
i need advice but PLS DON'T JUDGE!!!
last night i had a dream, i always used to dream my partner cheating on me with my friends, or being super mean, but since we had our baby those dreams disappeared. for context, we haven't been able to have sex yet, I'm 12 weeks pp, and my pelvic floor is so tense, and it's awful.
last night i had a VERY weird dream, it was so realistic, and different from others, he handed me his phone, and ask me to help him handle this girl, like annoyed? in the chat this girl was super obsessive, and messaged him a lot before he replied. she asked him to sing a song to her, and he sent her a voice message singing it, and other voice messages i couldn't listen in the dream. i wrote her to stop, and she was angry, telling me he started it. then i confronted him about this (still in the dream) and he changed his attitude, he seemed so guilty and said to me he had deleted some messages. i don't remember much else, but i woke up with the URGE of checking his insta messages. we've been together for 5 years, and I've never checked his phone, and neither has he (that i know if, at least) and contained myself, but I'm still very much concerned about it. it felt like an epiphany, a revelation or smth like that. I know people might think I'm overreacting but i can't get it out of my head, it was so specific.
i though about asking him to show me, but i know he'll be bothered that i don't trust him (i would be too in his place), but if he's cheating he would say that to make me feel bad. also i thought about checking his phone in his sleep, and then ask him to see his reaction, but feel so bad, i wouldn't like if he went through my phone without asking, even tho I have nothing to hide.
please, be kind!!
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it's pretty much an "is it anxiety or is it my intuition?" kinda situation
I’ve had a dream that predicted an event before, but some dreams are just nonsense. If it stood out and you believe it’s your intuition trying to tell you something, then you should definitely ask to check his phone. If he refuses then that should be enough to go off of.
This is crazy
I would start a conversation with him about how you had a really weird dream that has put you on edge and you are needing some reassurance and support because it's making you feel a little crazy/uneasy/uncomfortable/whatever you think describes the feeling best. I believe that would be the best way to go about it without sounding like you are accusing him of anything or that you don't trust him. Therefore it should spark a healthy conversation instead of triggering a defensive reaction
Just tell him about the dream say it felt so real and see how he reacts..
Explain everything about the dream and ask him if you can just check to help your mentals. The way he responds will say a lot; if his first reaction is to find some excuse to walk away WITH his phone as if to try to go find time to delete stuff first, red flag #1. But I had a lot of crazy dreams while I was pregnant and my boyfriend was always more on the understanding/wanting to ease my mind mentality of things than being annoyed and defensive. Just be open. Communication is best then being all sneaky, that'll only start arguments that maybe didnt even need to happen
If you have no reason in real life to not trust him then don’t read too much into it, it’s just a dream, I have the occasional dream like that and wake up in a bad mood and always laugh it off after I’ve told my partner about it, for me think it just comes from a fear of it ever happening but I have no reason not to trust him, he’s never given me a reason not to. I always have dreams random people are pregnant, 1 in probably 20 have turned out to be true, most of the times it’s just a big accumulation of content I’ve been seeing, people I’ve been speaking to, conversations I’ve been having and they just make up a scenario in my dream. If it were the other way round, I’d be really upset if my partner woke up from a dream and accused me of cheating on him and snooped on my phone because of it.
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