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Black moms making friends

Colourism

So I am Canadian-Jamaican and it’s such a spicy topic regarding skin colour. I have always considered myself black as both parents are from Jamaica. Externally, my dad would be considered “mixed” which stems from slavery. His family goes 2 generations back of mixed heritage. My mom is the descendant of Maroons that escaped to the mountains of Jamaica. When people ask what are you mixed with? I give them the spunky response with, “my mom and my dad.” Or when I tell them both parents are Jamaican they insist I give them more of a response.

Now that I have my daughter I already knew I had no control what DNA did in terms of skin colour. My fiancé is a dark skinned man from Antigua. When our daughter was born, she came out lighter than me. She is now 6months and basically is my twin except for when she frowns, that is all her father.

Now my mom has her “light skinned preference “ and has made comments on me dating a dark skinned man and she has also made comments about my daughter and her “good hair” and “nice skin.” Even my own dad has also chimed in on the skin colour of my daughter.

As a kid I struggled with identity and my blackness in schools that were predominantly East Asian. The very few black students in my school never wanted to be my friend because of how “light” I was.

I know times are different for some kids, but I wonder if any other moms out there struggle with colourism within your family or in the public?