SMP is diabolical

How’s anyone surviving on SMP!? I don’t qualify for free childcare yet so what I’d be paying makes it my whole salary. I’m not entitled to any help at all benefit wise. Ive paid into the system for 15 years and there’s just no help at all. Honestly feeling so stressed and down 😩

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

Sadly, im in the same boat. I have to return to work in a month and a half because we cant afford childcare. Im paying for someone else to look after my kid when they should make to easier for you to do it or make it not cost the earth.

It's a piss take.

Yes! Cost of living has done the same for us too. Its not feasible for one of us to stay home anymore 😔.

The MIL hasnt been nice either. She's all "i managed to look after kids", she didnt have a job or a boss who would be unhappy with you looking after baby and working.

Im scared to send mine after seeing some horror stories. Only I know what my baby needs, even his dad struggles- how is a stranger gonna cope?????????

Ive decided to go back part time. I am blessed with a job that's doable from home and very flexible hours (can work whenever I want as long as im available for calls during the day)

It upsets me. I can only imagine your feelings as I was lucky enough to have 6 months full pay. But even then, I need more 😂

It literally makes no fucking sense. I have to go back to work because I cant afford to stay home but I'll have to pay for childcare...which will be my whole paycheck. And there will be bills we now cant afford. Yet the government claims it 'does everything it can to encourage mothers to stay home til baby is 2'. It's bollocks

in our community

How would this make you feel?

My ex husband cheated badly. He then went on to mentally and financially abuse me during our divorce when I got the guts to leave.

I later found out he’d started sleeping with one of my best friends. Why she went there is still a mystery to anybody because she knew how nasty he’d been to me. She must have lost her mind.

Anyway it’s been five years. I heard down the grape vine that they’ve had a rocky relationship but they did have a baby together. They also just got married too.

Anyway guess what. He’s done exactly the same to her as why he did to me.

Part of me hates the thought of this happening to any woman. Especially when kids are involved but the level of hurt the pair of them have inflicted onto me also makes me feel slightly glad! Karma caught up with her. I’m sad he’s not changed his ways, he’s a truly nasty person.

But I feel so conflicted about being secretly sorta happy this has happened. I could have predicted their ways would come back to bite them. Also I hate woman who do this to other woman. Me and my friend had been best friends since we’re 14!

How would you feel?
Has this ever happened to you?

How would you feel?

About a week ago my partner lost his night retainer. He had his Invisalign about 4 years ago.

He's spent the first 3 days looking everywhere turning the house upside down and even not sleeping. He's been looking everywhere and not sleeping well at all

He got up at 4am and said I need to find them and I said babe come back to bed and he said leave me alone.

He starts work at 8:30, works from home. It was half 7 and he had our 7 week old and I said I got to her our 3 week old ready for nursery. He only started yesterday.

He was going on about his retainer and I said I'm sorry babe but it must not be here (we think our toddler must of thrown it) he started shouting at me calling .e negative and horrible and went mad. I now have the baby and my son is late for nursery.

How would you react?

Feeling guilty and awful

I dropped my little one off at nursery today it’s his second day and he was fine yesterday. But today he was crying and he had to be peeled off me. I feel awful , he goes from 7:30-6pm because I work and I wish I had it a diff way ! Does it get better will he settle ?

Feeling guilty

I am feeling really guilty. My baby is almost 8 months old, has learned she can stand up and all she wants to do is hold my hands to stand up. She gets extremely whiny, whingy and frustrated whenever I’m doing something that doesn’t involve holding her hands. This morning I was trying to set up a new baby camera and I couldn’t work out how to do it and she kept trying to climb me and was shouting and whinging. I pick her up and put her down on her bottom and I shouted ‘enough’ and she got really upset. this is probably me just ranting but when does it phase stops?! She used to be entertaining herself up until a couple of weeks ago but now she just won’t entertain herself anymore. I used to play with her and I still do now but before I was able to at least leave her do to bits, now no matter what new toys I show her she won’t let me wash bottles, tidy up, make lunch without crawling to my legs and cry 😭 I end up having to put tv on for a few minutes so I can sit down in peace without her whinging or whining. It’s constant, literally constant

Weaning

I started weaning my little boy around 5.5 months as he was more than ready and started on purées. I’m absolutely terrified of baby led weaning and wish I could get over this because I think he’s going off purées now as he loves the melty sticks and is great with them but I’m scared to give him anything else 😓

He’s 6.5 months now and tends to have breakfast and dinner, how can I get over the fear and offer him more solid foods?
Any advice would be appreciated as I’d love for him to be able to eat finger foods for when he starts the childminders in June!

Relationship falling apart

Hi. I’m wondering if anyone else’s relationship with their partner hasn’t been the same since having a baby and is falling apart? My boyfriend told me that if he knew it was going to be this way he wouldn’t have had a baby with me, and that I shouldn’t have become a mom. I should have researched it first. That because don’t want our son crying I don’t know what I’m doing and turning him into a Velcro baby. Our son is 8 weeks old. I’m heartbroken. I feel so alone and miss having a partner and best friend. He hasn’t worked or contributed to the bills in 3 months . He’s supposed to be home helping but all he does for the most part is make me food which he hasn’t done in two days.