Feeling so guilty

I think I’m going to have to switch over completely to formula, my breastmilk came through but it just didn’t seem enough for my baby, like yesterday he just wanted to be on the breast and didn’t seem satisfied, so I thought I’d pump and check, for 30 minutes I hardly got 30ml from both breasts. I feel so defeated because I’m hardly sleeping as I guess he just wasn’t full. So I’ve given him a bottle of formula yesterday and he slept for a good 2.5 hours rather than waking every 20 minutes. I feel guilty because I really didn’t want to lose that bond and I know a fed baby is best but I just can’t help feeling like I’ve failed. Please if there’s anyone with any advice on how I can get my milk back, I’m more than happy to try. Otherwise I guess it’s formula from now on

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So I switched at around 2 weeks because of supply/latching issues. It definitely does feel at first like you don’t make enough for baby as they are on it constantly but that’s how they’re telling your body how much milk to make. And all they want to do is be close to you and to eat! Pumping and direct feeding can yield different amounts.
I would recommend reaching out for support - HV, la leche league, NCT feeding team, local breastfeeding cafes etc if it’s something you want to continue doing, as even though they couldn’t help me (I had underlying reasons for mine) they were still so supportive and lovely.
But equally if you do want to go ahead with formula please do not feel guilty. It is 100% okay to stop, and those were the words I needed to hear on my journey. I still have a wonderful bond with my nearly 3 year old, she’s so healthy and thriving. You cannot look at a classroom of kids at school and know who had formula/breastmilk. Good luck with whatever you choose to do ❤️

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