Childcare / tax free childcare UK

Hi,

I’m a sahm and my 3 year old will be starting nursery in September. I’m planning to go back to work when he does. Not really got a career to go back to.
However, I won’t be eligible for 30hrs funded hours as my husband earns just over £100k. Only would be eligible for 15hrs which means I can’t really go back to work.

I’m getting really frustrated because I feel like we’re getting penalised for a parent earning £100k. Whereas 2 parents could earn £99k in a household and would be eligible for the 30hrs.

Anyway besides the point. I thought it would be good for me to go back to work and we could atleast get the tax free childcare which is 20% off childcare costs for him. And I could get a little bit of my independence back. However, I’ve just found out that if a parent earns over £100k then we won’t be eligible 😭
I was hopeful as the 20% off would really help and make it a little worthwhile for me to go back to work.

Does anyone have any advice? Or anyone been in the same position?

in our community

Mum and baby parking

I’m 32 weeks pregnant with my first and sometimes my partner and I park in mum and baby spaces in the supermarkets, but I feel guilty as we don’t have children yet I’m only pregnant.
What do you think about it?

just need to vent since i have no one i can talk to about the subject and i just need to let it out

so backstory, i’ve been in a relationship since january of last year and he proposed like three months in and i said yes since i actually felt loved for once.. fast forward to june, the first incident was he texted “hey sexy” to an old fling or whoever idfk but there wasn’t any texts after. i find out a month later when i went through his texts and found it in the blocked section, i confront him and he says he did it cause he was feeling lonely which is funny cause it was when he broke his ankle and i was taking care of his ass but whatever. i think that same month or the next he convinced me to have a baby even though i kept saying that we should wait (started thinking last month that he just wanted to baby trap me so i wouldn’t leave him) but anyways, everything is fine for the most part i guess until may after i gave birth and i was the only one taking care of the baby at night and basically doing all the work in general which was draining me a lot. a couple weeks after my baby was born, he finally offered to take night shifts every other day (lasted less than a week and i am still the only one taking care of the baby at night) but anyways, fast forward again to the beginning of the june, my mom finally kicks him out for not having a job and not even helping around the house. the same week where he lies about being in the shower for over an hour and half (i know he wasn’t in it since i checked on him twice and he wasn’t even in the shower but he doesn’t know that) and then he lied about being laid off from a job he literally started the week prior, i think he either quit or just got fired (mind you, he basically hasn’t had a job our whole relationship besides maybe a month total spread out through the year and half) but that’s when i started getting suspicious again and eventually went through his phone again like two weeks after to see if he was hiding anything else and i found a tab open on porn and a sexchat on his history… i confront him about it and he says that he’s been very horny (we hadn’t had sex since the beginning of may since i literally gave birth) and that he’s sorry and bla bla bla but it’s ironic since he literally said he found it gross or something. oh another issue is he’s just always on his damn phone and i just feel neglected.. but anyways, idk if i can ever trust him again and atp it barely even feels like we’re a couple. we barely kiss or have any physical contact and i just feel so unwanted… this baby is literally the only thing keeping me alive and is honestly the best thing that’s ever came into my life but this is the end of my vent i guess, thank you for listening, the end.✨

sorry if some of this doesn’t make sense, these aren’t all the details but i’m bad at long texts so this is basically the gist of it💀

Gov childcare

Does anyone understand what I’m meant to do?
My 3yo is at nursery 2 days a week and I’ve applied for my 1 year old to go in September (Sept is already too late becquse my maternity leave has ended, so he’s having to be looked after by grandparents).
Well I’ve had to reconfirm our details for the free childcare… and they’ve asked for my last 3 months payslips.
The last time I was paid on maternity leave fully was April. May I hardly got anything, June I got nothing. And for July, I’ll get the payslip at the end of July and they need it all by the 23rd of July.
I’m so angry, idk what to do. And if they decline the funding- what then? No way can we pay for them both to go to nursery because it’ll cost more than my wage.
I’m just fuming

Roommates with wedding photos

What do you do, when your husband is a great man, a great father. Your best friend…. But the love isn’t felt, the spark haven’t been for a while, you don’t argue, you have good times out, but your mates, there isn’t affection unless it’s occasional sex, no kisses just mandatory goodbye pecks. He doesn’t love me how I want to be loved, is that horrible to say when he’s a great man?

Money issues!

Can a relationahip survive money issues?

Eg.Partner A being a SAHP after losing their job in a bad way leaving trauma. Partner A now looks after the coupls 4 year old audhd child.

Partner B works full time from 6-2. Up until recently it was 5:30-2:30. Previously it was 6-3. So roughly the same hours. Partner B also travelled for work and spent roughly 5 of the last 12 months away working.

Partner B earns 6 figures.

Partner B gets stressed about money and snaps every now and again. It's random stuff too; Partner A picked up some latte sachets on sale, B snapped. Kettle gets broken, B snapped. Partner A needs to go see rectal specialist. B snaps.

Situation currently sucks and both need help.

Can the relationship survive?

Roblox Night Clubs

If yall ever want to go out clubbing but don’t have a babysitter just head on to Roblox 🤣 there’s a whole community of people who have created night clubs for parents 🤣 I was on TikTok when I ran into someone’s live and basically it was a Roblox nightclub and not going to lie it was poppin 🤣 I already have an account because I like to play with my son here and there so I just went in and honestly it was a good stress reliever in a way lol laugh all you want but I liked it I’m a sahm to 3 and this is the closest I’ll ever get to getting down on the dance floor again!