Birth trauma (????)
Has anyone had any experience with your birth being the most straightforward, best case senario, even some people’s dream birth, but really struggle to move on from it?
For some context, I had such a straightforward pregnancy with no complications at all. I went into labour late at night, went into the hospital to find out I was 7cm dialated and had given birth less than an hour later. My entire pregnancy, my only “birth plan” was I wanted the epidural, however wasn’t able to get one in time. That really freaked me out and was something I wasn’t prepared for, as someone with an extremely low pain tolerance. I was standing at the side of the labour bed, silently begging for the epidural person to hurry when i felt the need to push, my midwife told me to trust my body and do so, and within one push my baby was out. But the fear and pain I felt in those few moments have felt traumatising and have tormented me ever since. It feels so silly saying that as it was as straightforward as every woman hopes it to be, but a few weeks post partum I just remember thinking “I can’t ever do that again”. The thought of that pain as I pushed keeps me up at night and the look of my partners helpless face haunts me.
My friend had her baby by induction 5 weeks earlier, the induction failed over 5 days and ended in an emergency c-section, and she was also traumatised by that experience, so in comparison my birth was like a dream to her.
I guess what I’m trying to ask is it normal to feel traumatised from birth in general? I know that women have such traumatic experiences and I feel guilty by labelling my own as traumatic
Read more on Peanut
