Feeling like I’ve lost myself since becoming a mum, how do you find yourself again?

I’ve been struggling since becoming a mum. Most days I feel like I’ve lost myself and I’m just Mum.
I love my baby more than anything, but I miss me, travelling, dancing, getting dressed up, spa days, and doing things that made me happy.
As a single mum, money is tight, so those things feel out of reach. I’m also a foreigner here, without close family or that everyday support system, which can feel really lonely.
How do you find your way back to yourself after having a baby? What helped you? ❤️

in our community

Girls would you be annoyed if your partner was like this.

Ok so I need advice. I have been with my boyfriend 8 months. And we have been out for dinner like 2 times. Never been for lunch. He always says how tight for money he is. It’s ALWAYS me making plans. I even messaged him the other day saying can we have a date night on Friday night and even stated it can be anything just some quality time together etc. and he said oh don’t think I could this weekend it’s my sons birthday and I’m taking him away for the day. Which is completely fine but I’m off work on Saturday why can’t I also go? Or at least be Invited. He went to a concert 2 weeks ago and told me he spent 100 pound yet if I was to suggest going to a concert he would say no. I also want to go on holiday or atleast go to a city break at the end of September as I am off work for 8 days and my daughter who is 6 is going on holiday for a week with her dad. So I am literally free and will really miss my daughter but he says he doesn’t think he will be able to afford it. Yet this man works 5 days a week 7am-5pm above the minimum wage he could definitly save. Or I even suggested paying for most of it because it’s his birthday soon. Should I talk to him face to face and ask why he never plans anything with me?

Child care cost UK

4 days a week, 1 child is around £1500.

With 30 hours government assistance for working parents. We pay £850.

I couldn't figure out why for the past year I have felt broke all the time.

It just hit me today, it's these darn nursery fees.

If you work a 9 to 5 and send your kid to nursery in the UK are your feed similar or am I over paying?

It's crazy to think you go to work, to pay for someone to look after your child.

Would you leave your children aged 5&3 with your mil and go abroad on a holiday for 4 nights?

5 year old had sleepovers previously but 3 year old never did.

I asked my husband to ask his mum first, to see her opinion but he is asking me I should make my mind up first, which is right?

Porridge for a 7month old

Can I give this porridge to my 7 month old?? Or do I need to keep giving ‘baby porridge’ ?
Thank you

I swear Imma lose some brain cells

So I just left my 36 week appointment and I updated my sons father. After I told him how the appointment went, he gone say we need to talk.
I told him I can’t do it next week because I have college classes next week and work so I’ll be busy. He proceeded to ask me how I’m going to do this when I’m about to have our son.
I told him just because I’m having our son doesn’t mean I’m not going to stop going to school. He then proceeded to say how’s he going to have our son but how am I going to manage all this.
I said that it’s not going to be just him watching him and it’s going to be my mom or one of my sisters too and he then said no it’s going to be just him so I doubled down and said no it’s going to be my mom or my sisters as well. I’m guessing I pissed him off because he looked at it and didn’t respond

Am i being unreasonable?

So, my little girl is almost 16 months old. I split up from her dad when she was around 4 months old. He has been having her overnight at his parents every weekend but i have told him that i would occasionally like to have her on the weekends so i can do enjoyable things with her? He doesnt seem to do much with her apart from going to the local park and staying in the house so i just feel a but bad about her missing out on fun things?
Whenever i do tell him that id like to have her on a certain weekend, he tends to start an argument and threaten me with mediation sessions?
However i feel like allowing my 1 year old to stay away from me every weekend is generous of me? Its only that perhaps once a month id like to have her om a weekend day? He only wants to have her both saturday and sunday as he lives an hour away and thinks its too much driving just to spend one day with her?
Am i being unreasonable for occasionally wanting to have my daughter on a weekend?