Solo parenting in a relationship

I feel as though I do everything with my child where as my partner will do everything for his kid (my step kid) but doesn’t show responsibility for ours , I get up in the night , I get up early mornings, I make sure he’s fed , bathed , changed etc. and if I do ask for him to get up with him the odd time he gets annoyed and I feel stuck. My son woke up at 3am and is still awake now at 5:15 I have to get my partners kid up for school at 7am. My sons awake because he’s got a blocked nose and can’t breathe while he’s sleeping because a few days ago my step kid kept sneezing all over his toys and in his face so he has now caught a cold but I’m too scared to ever say anything to my partner cause he acts like I’m attacking her. I’m so stuck and I feel like a single mum while In a relationship😞

in our community

Extreme Boy Moms

This might be an unpopular opinion to post on the Boy Moms group. I think it’s inappropriate to rearrange one’s identity around being a boy mom.

For example, my MIL came to me when I was 24 hours postpartum. She said “you are so lucky to be a boy mom. Boys are so much closer to their mothers!” I understand the sentiment, but this should not be shared out loud. Especially when this woman has a daughter. However, she is completely enmeshed with my husband. She keeps on wearing my husband’s clothings from 10 yrs ago(college years) when she comes to visit. When my husband confronts her and ask her to stop wearing clothes he abandoned at the family home. She says “but it’s warm!” To me, when boy moms take it to the extreme like my MIL. I just want to call out the emotional incest bs I see. 🤮

Am I wrong to feel uneasy?

My son goes to nursery two days a week. Every child is assigned an adult/ member of staff. My son is two and a half and has had this lady for nearly a year, she tells him she loves him every time I pick him up and I overheard her getting him to say I love you to the moon and back to her.
Am I in the minority thinking this is a bit much?

Going off my partner

Myself and my partner have been together just over 6 years and we have 3 kids together but we have known each other for a lot longer. Just lately everything he says and does just annoys me! Like I can tell the kids off about something and then he could tell them the next day and I’m just instantly irritated. We have had a lot of different issues over the years but I really do feel like I’m massively going off him! Anyone been through the same? Anyone got any advice 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why offer to do something but make me feel guilty about it?

My period is due in a couple days, I'm so hangry and jjust want some salty crisps. I mentioned it in passing as I'm putting the kids to bed and my husband goes "do you want me to go shops?" So I say oh yeh please, and then he starts moaning as he's getting his shoes on like "you were out earlier why didn't you get them then? Should've just got something when you were out" etc etc. I'm like if you don't want to go out, then don't? I didn't ask, you offered.. No point in doing a nice thing but then making the person feel guilty about it. Like, I wouldn't mind going myself once I had put the kids down to bed. Honestly.. Yes I could've got something when I was out, but I had a million and one other things to remember to grab, whilst dealing with a baby and a toddler. Then I'm home, making dinner, doing the laundry, making sure bags are packed for tomorrow, doing bathtime and bedtime myself, like my mind is never thinking about what I want for myself... He could've offered to do bedtime and I would've happily went out myself. Or he could've just not offered at all if he couldn't be bothered. All I said was "I could go some crisps" literally..

4 year old scratched new neighbours car with her finger nails

Moving stuff into property at the time and cctv caught my daughter running her hands over the car and there's faint nail scratches on the car. I've stated that its cheaper to by the stuff to do it yourself and I don't mind buying that but they want to get it done at the garage and I can't pay their prices (at least they didn't go to claim on insurance like they originally wanted to do). I'm a newly single mum and had to emergency leave the property due a leak in the roof and bedroom wall is falling apart. So I've had to get rid of furniture as it didn't fit through house as well as a oven, washing machine and tumble as I didn't already have one and need to replace wardrobes etc. So I'm freaking out over this because I know she done it and I want to be neighbourly as we will be living by each other for years to come but I can't afford it. Its barely noticeable and she's got other marks on her car and its not even an expensive car.
What shall I do?

Am I alone?

I wondered if I could share my upset with anyone else hopefully/hopefully not going through the same. My 20 month old for the past couple of months is going through a very intense parent preference, only wanting his father and not me at all. Some days he won’t let me anywhere near him. Won’t look at me without screaming, won’t let me touch him, at night he screams for dada and will not let me pick him up. Most days he won’t let me play with him if his father is near by, will scream for him and we can’t be in the same room with each other… I understand separation anxiety but this is so incredibly hard and I worry I am doing something wrong or if it’s based on how I am feeling?! It’s just been going on for a few months now and I am really finding it hard not to start to look from the outside in in their relationship that I am not part of anymore. I also find it hard as my partner keeps telling me I should engage more or do certain things but I try everything and now I feel I am pushing my own son to love me the same and it’s killing me