Hi girls,

Best advice I gave to myself “take what you need “ we can’t make anybody do or be anything but what you can do is put that same type of energy into yourself as well. Lock your room door when you need to. Dads in charge later guys, and guess what ; no one will expire while you are away. What you say to yourself becomes what holds true.

Your partner needs to step in. Even if its only once a week or an hour a day. My partner works 10 hour shifts sometimes 6-7 days a week (mandatory 50) and he cooks everynight and helps with the kids when I need a break. The best thing to do is have a conversation with your partner that you need some time to yourself.

Plan it between lunch and dinner where there are no naps and leave him with the kids. When you get back and hes frustrated and overwhelmed thats your time to shine and explain I was gone for length of time and you are right where I feel everyday. This is what I mean by I need a break sometimes.

Having 1 kid was hard but she was getting older and it was getting easier and we threw a baby into the mix. I'm almost 8 mo pp and WE are still struggling to keep up most days. But he also realized that no matter how tired he was I was exhausted.

Ppl don’t realize being a stay at home mom is sooooo much work maybe you should visit your parents so they can help I live with my mom still and she such a help

So if he works 40 hours a week, assuming he sleeps 8 hours a night, that means he gets 72 hours of free time a week. And you get 0. Whether he works or not, this isn't fair, this isn't balanced, this isn't a respectful equal partnership. This is a man who is living his life EXACTLY as he did before having kids, in fact it's potentially easier cos he has his maid to do everything for him. Partners don't need to "help" with things at home. Partners need to CONTRIBUTE to raising their children and maintaining their homes. He's taking the absolute piss. This isn't what being s SAHM is. I bet he makes you beg if you need to buy nappies. Sit down, talk to him, tell him it's time to grow up and be a man, be a dad, and make the effort before it's too late and you're gone. You don't deserve this. He's lazy and pathetic.

Girl, you are burning out! You aren't getting any support. Being a stay-at-home parent doesn't absolve the other partner from doing THEIR SHARE. He's at work 8 hours a day, he's getting a BREAK. He gets to have adult conversations, take a piss on his own and not have to drink cold coffee because one kid needed you, then the other, then the chores, the meal prep, etc etc etc.
You need real time to disengage from the kids. And no, grocery shopping on your own doesn't count! Though it is a decent first step. Leave the kids with him, walk out the door and turn your phone off for an hour or 2. Don't do the hours of prep ahead of time to ensure he's prepared for every possible eventuality. Just decide to walk out the door. And do it! Go to a movie, take a long walk, sit down in a cafe. Catch up with old friends. Anything that works