Birthday ideas?

Hey everybody! 👋🏽

I know it’s a while away but is anyone thinking of what to do for their toddlers birthday? My baby boys birthday is 4th Jan, we want to take him away somewhere but with everything closed and him being so active I’m really struggling for ideas this year!! We’re based in Birmingham but happy to travel. Will have to be over a weekend as of work/nursery schedules.

Any ideas or suggestions are all welcome 🥰🩵

in our community

Finances - how do you share these?

Curious to know what others do in terms of shared finances - mortgage, bills etc. My husband and I have always done everything 50/50 but since having our daughter and me returning to work on reduced hours, my salary has reduced and with the cost of living I'm finding it hard to save.

For context, my husband earns almost double what I do, and I'm wondering now if we should be managing shared finances in a way that's more proportionate to our earnings e.g. he puts in more as he earns more.

Is this the norm? I'm so curious as to what other couples do, but don't feel I could ask this to my friends and people I know personally as I find talking about money so uncomfortable! 😅

Temper\Reflux and postpartum guilt

Just looking for anyone who is in the same boat ❤️

My 5-week-old little man definitely gave me false hope with how chilled he was for the first couple of weeks! 😂 The past two weeks, though, he has really struggled with the whole “knowing how to be” thing. He has mild reflux and on-and-off episodes of bringing his milk back up, particularly during the night.

But now the witching hour seems to have turned into a witching 3 hours from the afternoon onwards! He goes into a full-on temper cry and nothing seems to console him. I can usually tell when his cries are because he’s uncomfortable or in pain, but sometimes he just goes from 0–100 and becomes completely inconsolable until he gets his bottle.

He wants feeding pretty much every hour, fights sleep during the day and is waking every couple of hours through the night. 😩

Please tell me this gets easier? 🥺

I’m a solo mum and live in a small flat, and honestly, I’ve found these episodes really hard to manage on my own. I’ve pretty much moved in with my parents recently, and they have been an absolute godsend. They both work full-time and are tired themselves, but they’ve given me so much help and support.

I’m trying really hard not to feel like a burden or guilty for needing them, or for struggling to navigate my own space and manage this whole new adventure on my own.

I know I’m doing my best, but some days it just feels really, really hard. ❤️

If anyone has been through this around 4–6 weeks, please tell me it gets better!

Witch hunt...

This might cause problems. But I am sick of expressing an opinion that is DIFFERENT and it causing a witch hunt.
This app is supposed to be for support, expressing opinions and seeking advice and friendship.
Honestly, i just feel like telling someone to "come at me bro".
I didn't supervise all my daughter's naps and sleeps... light the torches
I don't use float vests etc for swimming lessons. I use rings when not doing swimming lessons... form a mob
I don't always cook fresh... tie the noose
I let my daughter play in the mud... STRING ME UP!!!
I raise my daughter the way I see fit she is not neglected or abused. She eats most things I give her. She is a happy and loved little girl. She is also the picture of health!!
She has slept in her own room since she was 5 months old.
We've practically stopped breastfeeding.
If you do not like my opinion or the way I do things... MOVE ALONG!! Or ask me why! I will happily answer. But for god sake, STOP THE WITCH HUNT!!!

Am I the problem here?

My 24 month old has been getting increasingly more clingy and anxious around children and unfamiliar adults. Its at the point where as soon as we drive into the parking area of playgroup he starts melting down. no other child seems to react like this...they may be shy at first but will enjoy after a bit. He has become worse and worse and now even if I force him to go he sits and cries into my neck for the hour.
I keep being told to push him into nursery and eventually he'll get better. My mama heart just cannot do it and it's causing both if us significant distress. Even my partner says he just needs to go and he'll get used to it like other kids. The issue is...i don't think we can measure him by other kids...ive never seen such clinging in any other toddler. Is this my fault because I haven't pushed him? I do come from a very anxious family, enough to believe it may be genetic. I honestly don't know what to do...

Would you rather have a really book smart intelligent child or a really talented child (can sing, sports etc)?

Not a serious post, just for fun.

TW: SA?? I need help

I've been really struggling because I've been remembering some things from my childhood that I had completely blocked out, regarding my dad. They're very strange memories, and I'm 100% sure they happened. No matter how I look at it, it's not appropriate behavior.
I have a very rocky and unstable relationship with him. This past year, after my baby was born, we discovered he's a drug addict, but he's always had problems with substance abuse. I don't know if I'd rather remember more and have to decide to distance myself from him (I don't know if I'm brave enough to say anything to the rest of the family) or if I should ignore these feelings. The idea of cutting him out of my life for some reason seems unthinkable to me. I don't know if I feel sorry for him? I'm having trouble processing my emotions about him.
TW: My most vivid memory is from when I was very little. It was normal in my home for my parents to walk around naked when it was hot, but I remember my dad getting out of the shower, and I stared at him and asked him what he had between his legs (I must have been 3 or 4 years old). He told me it was his penis and asked if I wanted to touch it, and I did. I remember it was hard. I don't remember what happened after that.
I'm so ashamed to even write this here. I've never told anyone, but my mom once said, laughing, that I had told a family dinner with a lot of people that I had touched my dad's penis. (this makes me feel like it probably wasn't a big deal, if my mom knew, but at the same time, she has a history of making excuses for his behavior, even when it was BAD.)
When I was a child, I was also abused by a neighbor. I also had hypersexual behaviors for someone so little, and I had problems with urinary incontinence until I was a teen. I also remember being afraid when my dad came home at night. All these things make me think that maybe more happened, and my brain blocked it out to protect me. He also slapped me when I threw tantrums; the last time he physically assaulted me I was 14. I remember being put in the shower and having ice-cold water poured over me, with my clothes on, when I was a kid. All of this was considered acceptable behavior in my house.
I don't know if I'm exaggerating or not. Thank you so much if you read everything. If someone would be so kind as to share their experience or opinion, it would help me a lot!!!