Really struggling with husband

It’s super common for guys to have trouble connecting with babies before they are born and even for a little after. My husband, as excited as he was, too many while to bond with our girl because there isn’t much they can do when your pregnant and even when they are a newborn. Give him time

Thank you. I’m just so emotional these day’s the tiniest things are getting to me and making me want to cry. It’s so annoying 😭 I know my husband will be a good dad and will love our little girl I just wish he could experience what I am

My fiancé is the exact same way! He tells me it’s difficult to feel the same kind* of attachment and connection to the baby, because the experience of being the one to grow the child is so vastly different from the experience of the one who helped make the child. He shows his excitement in other ways- getting a job he feels can better support our daughter, reading up on gender equality and how to raise a strong little girl to not be overrun by life in a “boys club” world, surprising mama with having the nursery fully painted one afternoon while I’m gone, putting the crib together because he knows it makes me feel better to be prepared as early as possible. He says he is looking forward to feeling the intense connections at birth and after she gets here and becomes this real thing to him, not just movements he can sorta-kinda-not-really feel. It is a whole different world for them and for us during this time, but different doesn’t necessarily mean bad or non existent! My fiancé —

(Cont) and I found that daydreaming and talking about the future helped get him into a mindset that made it easier to feel excited, like discussing what it would be like to be a family of three, holidays together with her, sharing in memories and moments we never thought we’d experience with a little one of our own like when she colors a picture for us, or screams “daddy’s home!!!” for the first time. It really flicked a switch in him when we started talking about what’s to come with her!

I know it can feel disappointing but for some dads it doesn’t click until the baby is born. My hubby was similar in not being excited about ultrasound, baby kicks, etc. but once the baby got here he was and is the most engaged loving and hands on dad I could’ve ever imagined.

Guys tend to not get too excited until baby is either already here or maybe even after a few months of the baby being here. I know my husband was afraid to homd baby very much until they were a little bigger and had more weight on them. He was afraid he would drop them or something so thats when he seemed to be more excited. Men don't feel what we feel from the inside so i guess its hard for them to get attached like we do so early.

Honestly hun don't be upset or take it to heart mine is exactly the same. They don't feel how we feel, they don't carry the baby all day and connect like we do. When the baby comes he will fall in love. Until then don't take it personally x x

my husband and several of our friends have talked about how that connection and the “i would die for this baby” feeling doesn’t come until a few weeks after they are born.. try not to worry about it too much. your connection to baby will always be different than his.

Something interesting about men and women is that as the mom we are literally growing the baby and feel connected to them early on where the men usually don’t feel a connection until they first hold the baby. It’s super normal for guys to be excited but not express it because it’s more of an idea then a reality till they see baby. Meanwhile as the woman growing the baby we are reminded by our symptoms and changing bodies that this is a very real thing.

Mine was the same but the second he saw his boy - he became his world. He’s a shitty partner but an amazing father

Men have a hard time when we’re pregnant. They don’t get to feel the baby grow, kick, hiccup from inside. It’s just harder for them to process. As soon as her holds her in his arms for the first time you’ll see it in his face, his whole world will change. ❤️

My husband was the same too! Every time I would ask him to feel our son kicking or send him sonogram pics he just seemed indifferent. I didn’t take it personally or let it affect how excited I was because ultimately we can’t control how they feel. Our baby boy is almost 4 weeks old now and my husband cannot get enough of him! It’s crazy how much of a softie he is for our son since he was born. I hope this happens for you in your situation, if not, I’m sure he’ll come around! You know men aren’t good with their emotions 🙄 I highly recommend your husband getting some skin to skin time in the hospital once baby is born. I think it made a difference for my husband!

Girl! Important things first, you are not overreacting! I know it’s hard to feel like your (very real and tough) emotions are valid when the worlds perception is that girls are already too emotional, so they’re WAY too emotional when pregnant, but PLEASE know that your emotions are no less valid than anyone else’s. Second, it sounds like you’re both working to communicate here, and that’s awesome. Both men and women can struggle with not feeling that connection right away, and it can definitely be tough and confusing for either party. I think it’s important that you both keep communicating, you keep expressing your desire for him to connect, and he keep trying/being honest about the progress he’s making.

Same here - it doesn’t help that our hospital won’t allow partners in for any appointments or scans because of Covid, so he’s missed seeing the baby for the first time, and hearing the heartbeat. We’ve booked a private scan where he is allowed to come, and if baby cooperates we should find out the sex together today. Hoping this will help him feel connected 🤞

Yes I think that’s totally normal. Try not to worry about him and just continue to bond with baby and enjoy it by yourself, talk with us ladies when you want to just talk nothing else besides how excited you are, because we completely understand