✨ AITA? ✨

Fist, about the in laws for context. My sil has 2 kids, a boy 4yrs/old and Girl 18m/old. I have a Boy 12m/old. I want other girl and my Boy to be best friends cause they roughly the same age and he needs peers since I don’t have many friends with kids. But her Boy is really aggressive. He Pulls his sisters hair, tries to push her down the stairs, and wrestled with her like she’s double HIS size. They have fallen into the gentle parenting stigma that discipline is bad and they don’t do anything other than say “oh we don’t do that”. When they do “time out” they take him aside and make him play by himself with all the toys and walk off, bot setting a timer, just redirecting him, but then he goes right back to it. They say hes imposible to work with and he refuses to listen which I know isn’t true cause when I babysat him he didn’t like me but he listened. He screamed for candy and I told him ONCE that he has to finish his food, and every time he asked after I’d I’d say “You know my answer” And he ate.

So, what happened was last night we had a dinner party at the mil’s. The kids were playing and my husband heard our baby crying. When he checked on them my bil left the kids alone and their some was beating out kid with a toy. This I’d not the first time but it was the last straw. I’m tired of him not being reprimanded for his actions. So I texted her after and said that unless they start really teaching him it’s not ok to hurt others, I can’t leave them alone together.

If I get sick, I’m on my own. They claimed they weren’t contagious, I said I don’t want to take the risk with my kids right before Christmas. My sis was on meds only 2 days, my mom told me only 2 days before how she called in sick & was fighting a “terrible” cold & felt awful. It’s flu season! My kids’ immunity is down because they just had a cold.

We weren’t even having a party, just ordered in food & cake, only my MIL came over. I told them we might as well stay apart so we can all be healthy to hang out for Christmas. They kept arguing with me, I told them I don’t have energy or time for that.

Then NOBODY texted or called me or my son to wish him a happy bday all day!! At 8pm I sent a group text to my family asking if anyone was going to before he went to bed, 1 finally FaceTimed, said sorry he forgot what day it was cause he was out earlier dealing with his friend who’s dying, ok no problem I understand, thanks for the apology, he had already sent gifts a month prior. The other 2 called & gave me the cold shoulder asking if they can talk to him, then got all excited.

I told my mom I was hurt & upset & felt like she’s giving me a hard time, she said “I get that, but…”, then days later said she acknowledges my feelings & apologizes that my son’s bday “slipped her mind”, but he’s very important to her.

So I (28f) and my partner (34m) found out that I was pregnant 2 weeks ago… I am currently 6weeks+4. This was not a planned pregnancy. My partner was not over the moon about the pregnancy due to our current circumstances as we are currently living with my dad whilst we are in the process of buying a house and not due to move in until December. I told my partner that my 12-weeks scan is on 10th Nov and he has said that he can’t make it because he needs to save his annual leave for when we move house (renovation work needed) and can’t get the time off work. Considering this is our first child, I feel that he should go to the 12-weeks scan with me. I feel that he is not fully on board with this pregnancy because he makes little jokes and stuff about names etc however when the real talk happens, he changes subject very quickly. AITA for being angry that he won’t take the time to come with me?

Also I haven’t told my family that I am pregnant yet just in case (waiting to get out of the danger zone)

Edit- just so everyone is aware, the reason we are living with my dad is because we sold our apartment and the buyer wanted us to break chain so he can move in sooner as this one has taken some time to go through and our apartment had already been on the market a year so wanted it sold.

My fiancé have been together for 2 years. Before we got together he liked this girl that hung around with my brother in law’s girlfriend, we’ll call her Lucy. My fiancé and I were friends at this point through my brother, and when I asked my brother if he still had feelings for her my brother told me no, she’d rejected him. We got closer and the rest is history.

Lucy, my fiancé, his brother, his brother’s girlfriend, my brother and my brother’s girlfriend all work together, for reference, so we all know Lucy personally. I was never super close to her but we spoke civilly at work whenever we were on shift together. I noticed after my fiancé and I got together she started either flat out ignoring me when I tried to speak to her or would give me one-word answers. She also started getting snappy with me. I didn’t think much of it originally, but it got worse when I got pregnant.

She’s very weird with my fiancé’s brother’s girlfriend, borderline obsessed with her since she’s her only friend, so I originally presumed she was jealous because I was spending so much time with her due to seeing my fiancé’s brother a lot. I mentioned to my fiancé a few times that maybe she was jealous of me and him, which didn’t make sense to me since SHE rejected HIM, so I didn’t really believe it. It just confused me because she never seemed bitchy to anyone else, just me.

Well, a few days ago we were talking about some drama kicking off at work between her and another girl. I mentioned again how she’d treated me before my maternity leave and suggested the possibility of either her being jealous of my friendship with my brother in law’s girlfriend or her inexplicably being jealous of mine and my fiancé’s relationship. He then decided to tell me that she actually DID like him when we first got together, which is why she spent 1.5 years talking to me like shit under her shoe. When I asked why he didn’t tell me, he said he forgot about it because it didn’t seem important, basically brushing it off. I got annoyed and told him I deserved to know why someone was talking to me like shit. My brother in law’s girlfriend told him months ago. I ended up dropping it.

Today I spoke to my brother’s girlfriend about it. She already knew and better yet, my fiancé told her not to tell me. So not only did he deliberately keep it a secret from me, but he also lied about not telling me just because he forgot and it didn’t seem that important. He claims he didn’t want to start an argument, but when I asked why he thought I would start an argument over another girl liking him 2 years ago when he’s not cheated and I’m not threatened by her, he didn’t really answer. Just kept saying he didn’t want us to argue.

So, AITA for being annoyed at him and feeling like he’s broken my trust?

Am I the AH for getting g upset that I’ve had to go out on Christmas Eve to go and get my own presents “from” my partner and my baby girl using my own money because he didn’t get me anything even though he’s had all month to? I just feel a bit heartbroken to be honest 💔