AITA for being angry at my partner because he won’t come to my 12-week scan?

So I (28f) and my partner (34m) found out that I was pregnant 2 weeks ago… I am currently 6weeks+4. This was not a planned pregnancy. My partner was not over the moon about the pregnancy due to our current circumstances as we are currently living with my dad whilst we are in the process of buying a house and not due to move in until December. I told my partner that my 12-weeks scan is on 10th Nov and he has said that he can’t make it because he needs to save his annual leave for when we move house (renovation work needed) and can’t get the time off work. Considering this is our first child, I feel that he should go to the 12-weeks scan with me. I feel that he is not fully on board with this pregnancy because he makes little jokes and stuff about names etc however when the real talk happens, he changes subject very quickly. AITA for being angry that he won’t take the time to come with me?

Also I haven’t told my family that I am pregnant yet just in case (waiting to get out of the danger zone)

Edit- just so everyone is aware, the reason we are living with my dad is because we sold our apartment and the buyer wanted us to break chain so he can move in sooner as this one has taken some time to go through and our apartment had already been on the market a year so wanted it sold.

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That’s hard. You’re not an a-hole for sure. It’s possible he’s in denial, and I get it’s hard to get off work. I’m pretty sure if he told his boss that it was the first ultrasound they’d let him take an hour off. That was the case for my husband. I think it’s important that you let him know that you really want him there and would like the support, especially since it’s early and you don’t know what you’ll see. I know the first ultrasound was super nerve wracking for me. I told my family right away so I would have support in case of a miscarriage. It’s up to you if you don’t want to tell them, but if he won’t go with you maybe your mom would. It could make you feel better. Best of luck. I’m here for support if you need it :)

NTA. Do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t want to see their baby?

This is a hard one for me. Because he’s being responsible about not taking leave until it’s “needed”.
Could he take off afternoons without interfering with his PTO? My husband was able to do that. And I just scheduled them all later in the day. But he wanted to come, I just needed to arrange accordingly. It’s the.. lack of interest for me that I find an issue.

You’re not the ah for wanting him there, and being upset about it. But he’s also not being exactly an ah for being distant this .. early.

I would ask him if it’s that he doesn’t care or want to see them? His response to that will tell you a lot.
If it’s no, then might wanna rethink everything tbh

But if it’s I do, I just also want to be able to fix our home for them before they’re here. (Which like aw, responsible. Love that for you) then maybe try to find a way to compromise. Like he go to the first and like last, or as I said he take afternoons off for them.

But you’re not the ah, main point

in our community

Fed UP

I just feel so fucking agitated at the moment. I have 2 under 2 and one of them is autistic. So we have daily meltdowns etc. I'm up at 6am every day and don't sit down till maybe 10pm. I'm doing absolutely everything for them & the only break I get is going to the gym but I'm out for an hour max. As soon as I'm home I'm straight back at it, I don't even have time to shower.

My partners great but I don't think he has any fucking idea just how hard it is being with 2 small kids every minute of the day, managing appointments & the house. I'm starting to resent him. I'm snappy & miserable.

I resent my dog. He stinks & keeps malting everywhere. He's old so keeps shitting in the house.

The kids have kicked off for me all morning, yet as soon as he's here its calm & I look dramatic.

I'm not enjoying being a mum cos I can't cope with the constant stress. I've got adhd and autism so I'm overstimulated very quickly.

I've had ENOUGH.

A very autumnal pumpkin Macaroni cheese for the whole family

With added mini soya chunks and sweetcorn

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My toddler is strong willed. He knows what he wants and how he wants it.

Not all communication styles work with a strong willed child.

Any who, about 60 percent of the time when I pick him up from nursery they complain about his behaviour and him not listening. He is fricken 2 and half years old!

Before nursery he never had behavioural issues.

Any who I worry now they are putting this constant though in his mind that he is a bad kid.

He would say things like I'm not going to be a godo boy. Etc.

I got into an argument with my partner about reducing the days. Or even changing the nursery in general.

Am I over reacting?

What would you recommend?

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