Partner no longer wants baby #2

It makes me feel awful . I feel like I was sold a dream and he’s now backing out. I wish he knew this before we had our son as I never would have agreed to be with someone that only wanted one child. It doesn’t feel so simple to break up and start over with someone new as we already have a son. We’ve already started our family and he’s stopped it from finishing. I feel like I’m already compromising by settling on only wanting one more baby 😅

I don’t know, sorry for saying this but what a pussy he is if WATCHING YOU GIVE BIRTH was too traumatic… 😅 I would weigh everything together, the marriage and relationship itself if it’s worth to stay or not to stay.
Having children is so big thing the partner must really be everything for you to let that dream down.

I understand why he feels that way because I bled a lot and it caused me to pass out because i’m anaemic and it freaked him out and made him think I would die. So I fully get it but at the same time i’m the one it happened to and i’m willing to do it again 😅

This was us.. I had a traumatic first labour and he said he just couldn’t go through that again. I actually think he was more traumatised than me and I think we underestimate how horrendous it must be to watch someone you love go through so much as well as worrying about your baby.

For us.. time was the healer. As my son got a little older the memories faded slightly and he changed his mind. BUT I’d made peace with the fact that he might never and I wouldn’t blow my son’s life up for something that might not even happen. You may never meet someone else, you may not be able to fall pregnant again, you may suffer loss. Nothing in life is guaranteed but what you have right now is there and real. I found not bringing it up too often and letting him come round on his own really helped, I became a bit obsessed with the idea of another and would frequently try and bring it up as I was desperate to know the door wasn’t closed and that actually made it worse x

How old is your child now? How does he feel? If he feels it’s easier then can you not just say to him that the baby stage is just a stage. That’s what we told ourselves when we had another. Our first was so hard but I persuaded my hubby to have another and she was a dream!


But having 2 is a different ball game. I think going from 1 to 2 is harder than 0 to 1

How old are you? How old is your son? If you and your son are young, as hard as it is maybe try letting it be for a bit. Take the pressure off your husband. Give him space and time to hopefully come around to the idea so he thinks it’s his idea. I’d absolutely float the idea of adopting an older child because it’s so important to you having another. I’d like to bet a bit of money that this will make him see how important it is to you, and he’ll realize he probably wants to “create” another with you that’s blood related

Also. You could point out that he doesn’t have to be present at the birth (you can have a support person) and he will likely have very little to do with the baby because he will be tending to your toddler. My husband hasn’t once bathed our 7m old lol. I do about 98% of her care but he does a lottttttttt with our toddler. If they are his only real concerns seems like problem solved to me

How old is your little one now? Depending on your answer, I will then give further input.

Both me and partner were on the fence about another baby but we both decided that even after all the birth trauma we wanted our first to have a sibling. I did some therapy for the ptsd and I also had a specialist midwife talk me through my first birth notes and also come up with a new birth plan to ensure my experience was different second time. I had my second baby last week and it was the happiest moment of my life. The newborn stage is hard but doable and doesnt last forever x