6 month old baby in daycare full time, thoughts?

You risk disrupting attachment, which personally I think could have life long negative consequences. A house can wait, a baby will only be a baby once ❤️ there is solid evidence that shows putting a young baby in daycare has long term negative emotional effects going into teenage years.

thank you, I get where your coming from :)

I think it's personal circumstances

For me you can never get that time back with your child and I realise a home is important but ultimately how much difference would 6 months make?

thank you for your advice, it’s much appreciated and I’ll have a think about it

thank you, I know where your coming from and it’s definitely something to think about

you have to do what's right for your family and you will know x

Been thinking about it soo much, for me really its all but a culture shock, i just relocated here from kenya,africa...there you just take a maternity leave for 3 months and get a live in nannies as they are affordable people even get two...and mummies have an easy time no sleepless nights, moving to the UK i realised employing a full time house manager is not popular and its expensive...my partner could struggle if im to be a stay at home mum for over a year or if i get work then it could be mostly part time as child care duties are yours alone.
I was thinking of day care but still not sure how that could be viewed by people around me

I was a single mom and had to put my daughter in daycare full time at 4 months old. She's now 17 and she never had any issues. She was always a social butterfly and she did everything very early. Walk, talk, feed herself potty, potty train etc. She's very smart at an early age. I think it was good for her in the long run. She acts like shes my mom and took care of me lol. I would feel bad as well dropping her off all the time but we have an excellent bond to where we even feel what one another is going through. Dont believe everything you read. You'll drive yourself nuts. Your doing what you need to do to better his future and he won't even remember daycare. Times are harder now. Cost of living is just going to keep going up. My son is due in a couple weeks and he will be in daycare as well. Dont feel bad your a great mommy.

yeah it would be a culture shock moving countries and different people. All I can say is don’t worry too much about what people think and do what’s best for you and your family x I’m trying to do my best but I can’t make up my indecisive mind haha

thank you for your comment, I just read and believe everything and I overthink it too much but you have definitely eased my mind xx I know all children/babies are different but this means a lot

If you don’t have to, I wouldn’t do it. Spend as much time with your babies 💚

thank you x

Financially, due to the cost of quality daycare for a 6 month old (babies are usually more expensive) depending on your field and income, if the goal is savings for a home, you’d actually be losing money by paying for childcare.

Where I am, the quality childcare I would want for my baby is minimum 1200 a month. That’s with a 2pm pick up time 😭
as an educator, it wouldn’t save my family much money by going that route.

Yeah do what you gotta do but make sure you actually GOTTA do it.
You have a partner, use it. The extra money and house won't mean much if ALL y'all ain't happy in it.
Start part time for a month. Give baby time to adjust.

Not to freak you out but also pay attention to your baby when dropping him or her off at daycare AND when picking them up. Look for any changes & bad signs as well as baby's behavior when at home. It's not as easy to notice these things after an 8 hr shift workday. Whether you're full time or part time, don't let that be an excuse to neglect or put your guard down. Do NOT give that daycare 100% trust. You pay them to do their job. Not to give complete trust away. I'm sure you've got a great daycare though.

Honestly my daughter has been in daycare since 4 months old and she’s about to be 17 months old and that girl LOVES daycare! Some days I barely can get her jacket off her before she’s trying to run into her classroom. And I love that! Them developing ADHD and all that other stuff honestly in my opinion has many different fact’s attributed to it. But if you aren’t comfortable then keep your kid home. I believe kids get more and better social interaction when the are in daycare. Plus what difference would it make if you kept them home until school age and they have not developed enough school skills to interact with those kids

https://criticalscience.medium.com/on-the-science-of-daycare-4d1ab4c2efb4

Might be helpful to look at research over anecdotes. Anecdotes will always be mixed.

I believe this is bull. I have so many videos and pictures my from daughters daycare from the moment she first started up until now and my child is a lot smarter than those who came in later ( not to brag) but kids need that social interaction from OTHER kids early. Compared to the 1 year olds in her class my knows more words, colors, phrases and sign language compared to the child who just came who constantly cries because he was never around another child but ONLY around adults

I believe it’s also absolutely bull crap that the child will suffer long term with attachment blah blah blah
My baby went in at 5 and a half months full time by CHOICE! I returned to work because I wanted to, she never ever has cried. Since day one she didn’t even care that her father and I left. Not because she doesn’t care about us, but because she has a confident relationship with us and that’s the goal. Your child having a confident and secure attachment to you where she feels safe enough to be left and knowing you pick her up. We daily had compliments of her never ever crying. It was harder for us than it was for her. Since day one. She is 10 months old now, she still giggles and kicks her legs and smiles like crazy when she walks in the door of childcare because she knows where she is, and she still kicks and screams in happiness when she sees us for pick up. I do a lot with my baby when she is home, but could I do sensory messy play every single day?No way! She does heaps there

all this!!!! Girl! I feel you on everything you said!!! My daughter literally feels at home at her daycare and that’s what I want! I want that place to feel like a safe haven for her because if it wasn’t then that would be a problem. Like you she’s excited to see me pick her up and excited to see me leave lol she’s made lots of friends and when she sees them she rubs straight to them to play

My son , 17 m does really well. I’m a stay at home mom. We have a good bond

I have a horrible fear of daycare especially since the flu season is so horrible this year. I also know that there are many mothers who absolutely have to go back to work so if there’s no family that you can pay to babysit, I’d feel more comfortable with a care.com babysitter than daycare. I used to work for care.com and put my heart and soul into those jobs. I know that there are a lot of people who don’t take those jobs as seriously as I did but that’s what you look for in the interview. Also house cameras are extremely important too! Every family I worked for watched me like a hawk and it makes perfect sense because I would do that too :)

What does ADHD and anger have to do with daycare?

Adhd is a neurological disorder which occurs in pregnancy or passed down by a blood relative so I really wouldn't worry about a setting causing it

I was an infant toddler teacher, we had babies as early as 6 weeks in our care full time. It honestly made me so sad. Those babies just wanted their mama. At 6 months that’s definitely a better age, but from a daycare workers POV if you have the money to stay home, stay home as long as you can. If you’re only going to work to help your partner save for a house, I’d say the house can wait. You only get these precious moments with them once. I completely understand single moms having to work, and couples with low income need to work. However if you don’t need to I’d say don’t. But don’t feel guilty if you choose to go back to work. There’s nothing wrong with choosing to work to support your family. ❤️

I'm not saying it is bad for all children because every child is different. I was incredibly advanced for my age but my mum never put me in any daycare. However studies have repeatedly shown there are negative side effects to putting children under a year in full time day care. They literally tested babies cortisol levels and showed they are significantly more stressed at daycare than home. However not all children are the same so obviously some will not respond like that - these are trends, not "every child will be x y z". Personally I see it as a risk but obviously some people have to take it. I wouldn't do it myself. I wouldn't advise it either unless someone had to.

Comments like the 1st one are mom shaming at it’s finest. It’s actually sad. If you need to put baby in daycare that’s okay! Do what’s best for your family and please don’t let these people tell you that your baby will have issues because it’s just not true. Might take some time to adjust but baby will do great!!!

your evidence of long terms emotional effects is NOT true!!

Going to daycare doesn’t cause ADHD - it’s generally believed that most people diagnosed were born with it, or developed it after traumatic injury to the brain or an illness that affected the brain - you either have it or you don’t. Our daughter will be starting nursery at 9 months as my husband and I both work and she’s going to have a great time 😊 don’t feel guilty for doing what’s best for your family ❤️

what caused the stress? Missing their parents? Not being attended to efficiently or fast enough? The other children? Seems like one of those things that has skewed results because so many factors come into play

this is very true, I guess personally I want to look at evidence rather than anecdotes, and basically every source I looked at didn't recommend daycare below 1 year. However if someone has to do it I do understand that life isn't perfect and we all have to make our own decisions around risk.

I had read the article you posted. While there is plenty peer reviewed literature within it, she certainly does not provide a balanced literature review. She does not state benefits. And she cites no examples of literature where the opposite was concluded.
I am not in this academic discipline and I am sure there is alot more to read. I take on board alot of points in the article you attached and skimmed through abstracts of the papers cited. I think some good points to highlight were that children from disadvantaged backgrounds are likely to benefit more than those from affluent families from attending childcare. It definitely improves cognitive function. The main concern was around children getting stressed at childcare from play fighting and aggression between children due to reduced one to one adult supervision. If my child was getting angry and stressed at childcare I'd want to know and if the care givers aren't doing anything about it then it's possibly a bad nursery?

It's not my evidence, I spent many hours looking at different sources. It seems risky to me but then it's not my baby. I guess all these studies could be wrong but I would lean towards trusting that over anecdotes. Though most of them did say that the biggest factor was actually if the day care was good quality but if you're saving for a house surely you can't afford the best day care... But maybe my salary is too low to contemplate that.

I appreciate that you shared a source that reviews scientific literature, so thank you for that. On balance I don't think this is an unbiased review, it doesn't present the positives or the literature arguing the opposite. I'd also add a quick skim of recent literature focuses on the negative impacts of the lack of childcare during covid 19.

I think parents should review on their own circumstances, their own child's needs and review their own child's behaviour once in child care.
What we shouldn't do, all of as parents, is shame each other for doing what we need or choose to do.

We're all trying our best, and providing for our little ones in different ways.

Yes you are right, I didn't mean to come across as shaming, I guess the information I looked at made it seem like a potentially harmful choice and I would always want to give advice that led away from that, but as you said these studies can be biased and we all have to make our own decisions.

the evidence should factor in circumstances in order to be accurate. Otherwise it’s just an observation, and that’s not thorough research. I agree though. Some of us are more fortunate than others to not have to send our infants to daycare.

I wasn't implying you were shaming. That part of my comment was really addressed to us all.

I'm probably going to have to send my baby to nursery early, but I don't want to be ignorant to the research you posted. Atleast then I can be cautious about it and mitigate that risk as much as possible.

It's good to share both sides so we can make our own assessments.

If going back to work is what you need to do and what you want to do then I would.

My daughter is 3 and been going to her childminders since she was 8 months due to me being in uni. Now at 3 she loves going and gets excited. She is attached to me and we spend my days off uni together and she loves it. She doesn’t have behaviour issues or anger issues.

When I first sent her I use to cry because of guilt, but now I tell my self she will have a good future when she’s older as I will have a good job.

Just use your days of the best days and when you are with your littlen give them lots of attention and love and they will be fine :)

Every mum is different and will have different thoughts and opinions on this topic
Just do what is best for you and your family

Also could look at a childminder, I found them better for my baby than a nursery

Good luck x

Thanks everyone for your advice, I really appreciate it and it has eased my mind and I will do what’s best for my family and bub xxx

I loved that my kiddo went to daycare around 7 months! I was finally able to start feeling like myself again and he learned SO MUCH! Honestly do what is best for you and your family. For some people that’s staying home and for others it’s sending the kiddo to daycare. So long as you do your research and have a supportive network for each scenario it can work ❤️

My little girl started at 6months old part time to suite my shifts and she absolutely loves it and is above all milestones. You do what you need to for your family, no one can tell you whats best in this situation