Sleep!!!

Tbh I wouldn’t swaddle at 9 weeks, they’ll be rolling soon. You need to transition out of swaddles before they roll so you’d be starting it just to get out of it

The startle reflex is something they grow out of. Follow your babies cues rather than trying to enforce a routine

I would say he's too young for a routine yet. I was told not to think about one until they're 3 months x

Babies cannot regulate sleep until about 3 months of age; that being said, you’re going to have to put her to bed earlier. It’s recommended that babies at that age go to bed around 6pm

Bedtime by 730. Let them go through the motions, keep it dark. And use brown noise. And a baby doesn’t need a bath every night. You dry them out

Sounds potentially overtired, what are his naps like in the day?

My baby is 3 months and still doesn’t sleep when I want him to lol. HV said probably won’t be an official routine till 6-9 months. Just have to get them to understand night and day for now. My baby still wakes up at least once and sleeps 8 hours in total. Me and my partner are not getting on much as a result but we know it’ll pass - good luck!

6pm is also far too early at this age. Even if they have a long ish sleep they will be wanting to be up for the day for 4/5 am - don’t stress ! X

Have you tried doing the same thing each night but adjusting the time to their cues? That's what I do and now he had got himself into some sort of routine. But I follow his tiredness and hunger cues.

Also don't beat self up, baby will get there. Just follow the cues.

I was obsessing about times of feeds and naps, wake windows and following the eat play sleep. now I follow him and it seems to be working x

My baby is the same age and Ive let my her sleep when she want to sleep feed when she want feed. Never wake a sleeping babe to feed either .
since being born she goes 4 hours but last few weeks she’s going longer some times. I’m sat feeding her now aT 3.30am and her last feed was at 8pm wake window was 2 hours then put her down and been sleep since. Listen to what your baby want, x x x

We have a routine of bath, feed and bed. He’s usually in bed for 6.30 but it was kind of a routine he fell into himself by following his cues rather than me pushing it. He will wake for a feed 1.30/4.30 and wake for the day around 7am

Could he be over tired maybe? You could try starting the routine earlier?

Also is he napping in the day enough? Sleep breeds sleep so they say! If my little one gets overtired getting him into a settled sleep is a nightmare