Experienced mums - Routine?

This is my personal view - as a routine hater 😂
Routines are great for predictability and organising other things around baby and other commitments. However, there is a freedom of doing mad things on mad timings because Baby is portable and had no school to get up for. I live for that chaos. I find term time a bind for this reason.
I am all about following baby cues for feeding , sleeping etc. (even though it is so hard in the early days). When Baby is upset because of teeth, growth spurts, fireworks night, coughs and colds etc, I can't be too upset because there was no routine to break in the first place.
The only routine is for parents knowing they are going to be exhausted and Baby will kick off when parents are at their most irritated (early evening for me).
My twopence worth. And yes, my house is a permanent mess.

Hey 👋🏻 I wouldn’t say I’m experienced but my daughter is 2 and I’m 40 weeks pregnant now so I’m not FTM but routine has been the only way for us and will be with my second 😊 it gave me confidence that I knew what my daughter needed and when, helped others look after her as they knew what she needed, helped her at nursery too and I really believe it’s why she slept through from 5 months. But routine isn’t for everyone and you can still get the same outcome from being less routine too. Pre-12 weeks it’s very on demand and not so routine but they do get their own flow and I built around that plus I used just chill mama and the sleep dr to form some rough routine based on what my daughter was doing and when. What I found was doing it 80% of the time (ie naps in cot etc) meant the 20% I have been out for dinner later or she’s had a night away from us has been a lot easier. Don’t pressure yourself to have it all figured out &’my advice is don’t have expectations as babies like to mess plans🤣

I think this is what I was worried about like can I never go out for tea or something again if it means I might be out later than usual 😂

of course you can! I found it easier as it meant I could eat in peace as I knew when my daughter would be asleep 🤣 or meant my husband knew what was what so when I went out on my own it wasn’t stressful. same as nap times I’d plan when she was asleep or when she’d be eating so I could have a conversation and a hot coffee with a mate! I found it more freeing than restrictive but that’s my experience and like I say worked for us 🥰

Hi, I think it might depend on the type of person you are. For me, I tried a routine with my first baby and I wish I never did. A lot of my energy was wasted trying to get him into a routine which, did not work because he was a small baby and his needs were individual to him and changed constantly. I really wish I just rested and did not worry about routines and how I thought things should be. I think a natural routine does happen over time (a routine that is individual to your family), but the newborn stage is hard, and for me, it was made even harder with the expectations I had over a routine and because I had a baby who would not follow one anyway. With my second baby I really just went with the flow. I trusted my abilities as a parent more and that things were how they were supposed to be. Also, one thing I wish I knew then, was to not put too much pressure on myself to go places with a small baby. Before I knew it, I could do all of those things as they got older

We have a routine with my 18 month old, we don’t stick to it religiously but it is a good guide to get us through each day! I’d say sleep and wake windows are important because overtired babies are NOT fun 🤣 while they’re young though it’s best to just follow their cues as they won’t have a routine as such x

I would say a lot of it is down to the temperament of your baby. Just like adults some thrive on routine and schedules and some thrive on living more ad-hoc.
I tried a routine/schedule with my little boy when he was a baby, it was SO difficult, I was fighting him to go to sleep all the time, timing feeding sessions and then trying to keep him awake for 'wake windows'..
When I relinquished that control and just followed his ques everything was so much easier.
You could definitely try some gentle routines and schedules but maybe wait until baby is a little older so your confident in reading hunger/sleep cues first.
If it seems challenging then it may just be your baby is more free spirited and you can just be more casual with your approach. Don’t force it x

My personal view is that make the most of no routine as much as possible whilst they are small, as soon as they start on solids you are then going to find you need a routine of sorts so embrace the freedom whilst you can 😊

With my son we didn’t have a routine at all, he would happily take naps in his pram whilst in the bassinet and so it didn’t affect me going out as I just did what I wanted and of an evening we would bring him into the bedroom at the same time we went to sleep. I’m making the most of it now with my newborn as with my son once he started eating solids and was able to sit from 6+ months it got much harder to go out as he was sleeping less getting louder and wanting to grab at everything on the table when eating out. He also naturally put himself in a 10-12 and 3-5 nap schedule, so now I do stay home for his nap times 😂