Am i depressed??

Leave him.

I completfeel you on the lack of motivation and just the energy to do what we need to do for ourselves . Being a mom is real work ! It’s so hard to choose what your gunna get done with each little moment of free time you get , if any. I bet the news of your man telling you he cheated on you hurt . That’s a normal reaction to that type of news . As I was reading I asked myself would you have rather him not say anything about it at all ? Also why did he even bring it up ? Was it just a guilty conscience, was it out of conversation and that topic happened to pop up ?; I wouldn’t believe everything you guys had was a lie, tho I understand that exact feeling of having that thought . Some people can forgive cheating and some can’t function in a relationship without trust . I’d say have a real conversation about him doing that behind your back and his whole thought process and be open with eachother and work on it . If it still doesn’t work then at least you tried .

But to answer your question … yes you are depressed . But give yourself grace . It’s okay to be in a funk . Your a mom . Just know it doesn’t last forever . It’s always the little acts of self care that make a difference . I said a lot , Im going now 😆 hope everything works out for the better ! Even if it’s a different outcome than you expected. God works in mysterious ways like that . Sending love 🤍

thank you lyla. It came up as id already asked him to leave. He wasnt been the man i wanted him to be. Ie its my house, I pay the bills, i take care of the kids, do all the night feeds for twins!! i do the maintenance n decorating etc so i was looking at the lodger (thats how it felt) thinking what do you bring to the table!!?? working full time not take caring of us financially emotionally etc . He then explained he was going through a rough patch at work and was trying not to burden me with the stress of it but lost himself in the process. So he went bk to his moms and said he was gonna sort himself out. During one of our talks about him wanting to be a better person and man for me and our twins i said he still wasnt been honest with me about everything that was playing on his mind and thats when he confessed to sleeping with his ex 2.5 yrs ago. A yr into our relationship. B4 our twins. What a hell if a secret to keep and for so long . I would of walked b4 the kids if i knew what i do now.

So if you would walk away if there were no kids involved you should still do the same with them being involved. It doesn’t sound like the ideal decision but in reality you didn’t want to be with him before you knew .You also listed all the things a man SHOULD do and he’s done none of that . I’d start planning your next moves without him in all honestly . It sounds like you know what to do and want to do your emotions are just getting in the way of having a clear head . I’m a single mom by choice because of everything you just stated what this man lacks as a father and even a decent man ..

And in full transparency I’d rather be a single mom then have the added stress of relationship where I’m still doing all the work on my own anyways

I totally agree that had to hurt when you first heard it. It would’ve hurt me as well considering my husband was talking to his ex for a long time when we first got together and we had already started having kids by the time he still was talking to her and going to see her. I never knew what was going on but then I found out later that she was trying to kiss him and have sex with him, but he never let it happen so he told me I had to trust and believe in him because otherwise, I would go crazy. We already have four kids now hopefully 10 years of marriage has has erased her from his mind.