Christmas gifts

I’m curious where everyone sits on spending for Christmas gifts. We have not purchased many toys up to this point because my two year old has had the Lovevery subscription but has recently seemed like his interests are in other things. I canceled the subscription and am going to start the choosing and buying of toys ourselves now but was curious what others spending/gift count limits are for their kids. I’m also interested in if you are going to bring the santa tradition into your home and if so how many toys Santa might might bring.

Being that my son was 15 months old last Christmas and we had the Lovevery subscription, we didn’t get him much at all but I feel like there are many items he could now benefit from but am unsure where I want to end up on the Santa and parent gift count.

Thanks!

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We don't have the money to get more than one present and a stocking for him. My mom is renewing our zoo membership, my uncle is renewing our aquarium membership, my mother in law got us a Fernbank Museum membership.

Our family has asked us to make a list so we created one on Babylist since I was easiest to compile items from multiple sites.

We probably buy too many gifts. Usually one big gift and then a few smaller gifts from us and 1-2 gifts from Santa. Our families also go a bit overboard so my boys always end up with a lot. We go through old toys after the holidays and donate the ones they don't use anymore.

This year we were in a better financial spot so decided to do more then we usually have done. We have a 4,3, and 2 year old and we decided 9 toy related gifts and one big Santa gift for each child along with more fashion based boots, a few outfits/pj’s and one experience (ex. We got my son tickets to Jurassic quest)

We do “something you want” as one big ticket item, and then something you need, something to wear, something to do, and something for the family. 5 total gifts and then a homemade advent calendar with a mix of toys and needed items (ex: toothbrush, PJs, cheek balm, polar animal figurines, fruit pouch, etc.)

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Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

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