Anybody's partner making names impossible??

Our third girl now and I've been making lists all pregnancy.

He has one name he's always wanted so I agreed we could have it as a middle name as I've never been massive on it (so every name I've considered whether it works with this other name!)

Anyway he's just been dismissing EVERY name I've come up with so I gave up talking to him about it. I sent him my final list and he chose ONE on it that he doesn't mind but it's definitely not one of my faves, just one I put on there as a back up because I know what he's like and I'm feeling really resentful we're going to just have his choice.

Do I need to be firmer?? I know some women that have just said, look I'm carrying the baby, I'm naming them! Feel like just saying forget about the middle name now I'm really trying and you're not giving me anything!!! He keeps saying we'll figure it out when baby is here but I'm stressing out we have no name and it'll be some random last minute thought because I feel like I have been through literally every girls name there is 🤣 I told him to come up with his own list that he's actually put thought into because some of the names he's given me are just so random I swear he's just plucking them out of thin air.

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I had the exact same problem. Every name I suggested my boyfriend was against. Eventually I just let him choose some names and let me know which his preference was. And it actually wasn't bad so we went with that 😂

I don’t get why some partners are so obstinate about it. Yeah they helped create the child, but she’s doing all the hard work: carrying the baby for 9 months, going through all of the symptoms and physical, mental, emotional and hormonal changes and she’s the one who’s going to push the baby out of her own body, so I think she should get veto rights.

The only name my husband insisted on was one we were able to compromise on. I didn’t like the original way the name was spelled so he let me edit it and it sounds much cuter imo. He did admit that I had a point about not wanting her to get bullied if we kept to the original spelling. This is our 1st baby together (1st baby for both of us) and he’s letting me decide the name based on my intuition. We are saving the name he wanted for if we have a second girl, because this one just doesnt feel like the edited name would fit her personality.

I chose our girls name, my partner wasn’t keen on it but as soon as I gave birth I called her by the name I chose lol .. I’m quite stubborn but he loved it once she was here xx

He’s been against literally all of my suggestions so I told him straight up if it’s a boy, he’s already got a name (that I picked) because I’m sick of the back and forth 😂

I can so relate to this and it stresses me out so much! With my other 2 kids (not his), I had names picked out immediately and they stuck… we’re due in May with this baby girl and we have NO idea and I’m slightly panicking. I don’t want to wait until she arrives to choose a random name. 😅

You can try downloading the app Babyname - it has an egg with a yellow background for the app icon. It will allow you both to pick names that you like on your own time and then it creates a list of names that you BOTH agreed on. Maybe it’ll help you narrow it down that way?

Bugger that. I told my partner he already has your surname so that’s your part of the names done and I’ll pick the first name. He didn’t like it so I said that’s fine you pick his first name and he’ll have my surname. He didn’t like that either so those were the two and only two choices and he decided he wanted my son to have his surname, so I picked the first. Simple as that.

We are exactly the same 5 kids already and can't agree on anything our others all have names straight away however we have no idea on sex this time

The father of my child and I had an agreement. If it was a girl I'd name her and if it was a boy he'd name him. She turned out to be a girl so I made a list of all the names I wanted and let him pick from there. Originally we landed on Joy, but have since shortened it to Jo.

I totally forgot about this app!! I am so on it 🤣

always forget that they will already have their surname, such a good point!!

We both chose a boy and a girl name each as we didn't know what we were having and then flipped a coin to decide who would win the name battle for each 😂 We ended up with Henry Peter which was my husbands choice and it wasnt initially my favourite but two years on couldn't imagine him as anything else! X

Why not say exactly this but to him. You just need to express it in a constructive way… rather than as an argument or something negative… i’m really excited we’re having another girl, i was having a think about that names and the ones you selected aren’t sitting so well with me… could we choose a top three and then when she’s born we’ll just feel what her name is… or something like that and then in the moment when she is born i would imagine he’ll be more open minded.
This happened with my husband we were solid on two girls names and the middle names but could not agree on a boys name… anyway i said the very same thing as above… we had a long list and already agreed on one name but i said could we each pick a name from the long list… when my son was born i took one look at him and said his name to my husband and he agreed- it happened to be my preferred name! We’ll save the other two for a second baby! 😉

in our community

Divorced at 5 months PP

My husband just divorced me yesterday.

I'm 5 months post partum and I feel like complete shit. I literally can't stop crying and I don't feel like eating and this whole week my milk supply has gone down due to stress and not eating. What helps with milk supply?

The divorce- on Monday at 5am me and my husband had a small argument on text. It was regarding him not catering to my love language. I sent him a video on how women shouldn't have to ask and how laziness can kill a relationship. We've had many arguments regarding this prior about him not catering to my love language and he doesn't buy me flowers or doesn't think of me. Anyways this night, he text me saying he doesn't do Mother's Day and all that, he doesn't want to buy me flowers because my sisters buy me flowers and he can't be arsed with my moods. He said I've not been his peace and said he's done.
I replied "okay. All I want is for you to appreciate me and love me as your wife and mother of your child. I'm not pushing you away, I'm begging you to love me etc etc. I'm done too."

I come home from my errands that morning and he's upped and left. He took all of his belongings, clothes, drawer, tv- everything.

He didn't ring or text me or anything.

The property is in my name and as he left and didn't leave the key, I changed the locks the next day. I feel this is what pushed him over the edge.

He officially divorced me on Saturday.
I'm 5 months post partum and I have a 5 year old from my ex partner too.

I just want to talk about it with someone that's not biased. Was I asking for too much? I feel he just didn't want to be with me anymore and used this as an excuse? Or is that me overthinking....
Input would be nice xoxo

Partner is giving me the silent treatment

So I was struggling with my postpartum anxiety bad yesterday. My partner and I was out for drinks with family. He kept making jokes about treating me a bit shit.
Which no one thought was funny. I am usually quite patient about him using me as his jokes, but yesterday it hurt.

When we got home I told him it made me feel disrespected. Now he is giving me the cold fat shoulder?! What do I do ?

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

FTM

Hello,
FTM here. At what age do you stop applying cream on nappy area during nappy changes? My 2 year old boy isn’t toilet ready yet but uses both nappy pants/pull ups and regular diapers

Forgiving a partner…

Long story short - found out 2 months ago my partner of almost 10 years has slept with two girls, one of which he’s been seeing for 8 months - during this time I was pregnant with our third child and gave birth. (She had an abortion)
I found out, he cut all ties (still works with her)
I want to try and move on from this, we have three children , and a home… I can’t face the idea of being without my children half the time. I want to try and make things work. But I can’t stop the intrusive thoughts / images of the two of them together…. Any advice if you’ve been in a similar situation?
Sick of feeling this rubbish, also 5 month pp so hormones/confidence is in pieces😣😣😣