How to deal with aspergers
So I don't have a problem or anything like that but like does anyone know how to deal with someone who has aspergers, my bil has it and he's been living with us, and his "care taker" is my husband but he or I doesn't want to treat him like a child we treat him like a adult he is and he does pay rent ect. But he has a hard time cleaning up after him self, at one point I told him I want him to go clean his big mess in his room (like trash on the floor under his bed and around his bed to the point where you can't see the floor) I asked him, I told him and yet he didn't clean up the mess my husband and I ended up cleaning up the mess, I asked my bil if it's okay if I made him a schedule (he usually doesn't leave his room unless using the bathroom or food) and he said no I don't want one, is there anything I could do like someone to visit each week or therapy or something he works at a fast food since his senior year from school, I never delt with this at all. He can live by him self but he needs assistance along the way if that makes since,Like I asked is there something I can do or to help him?
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What does your husband think about it? You probably just need to set an expectation that his floor is cleaned up every Sunday or something if it's important that it be kept clean. Having a deadline may help. You could try having him pay for a housekeeper to clean it if he wont, but ultimately he is an adult and it's his room so if the mess is contained to the room and not spilling into the rest of the house, and not food waste attracting bugs and critters then you may just need to let him live in it.
my husband mostly not home he works m-f 7-7 and f-sun 4pm-12am so it's usually falls back on me, my husband even told him to clean his room and doesnt listen, we have mice and roaches(they rarely pop up but still) and sometimes ants, I do think he needs a schedule but I doubt he will follow it being that he's "stuck" in this comfort bubble If that makes since
Ahh that's incredibly hard for sure. Is it something you could do together like help him clean it on one set day a week? Or maybe giving him the option of having it clean every sunday or paying $50 extra for a housekeeper that week. Or something along those lines. Then it's an expectation with consequences.
not sure how to do the consequences part cause he has money he works he pays rent, and I can't just kick him out cause I know his others brothers or my husband side of the family won't him in cause of his aspergers for sure, I care about him but like I want him do stuff on his own without help, but he needs it badly, you would even have to tell him to take a shower
Right that's what I mean, the consequence is he has to pay you more to hire someone to clean for him.
ah I see, thank you I'll talk to my husband and see about this idea
I have the same thing but I would say he may get that from the people he were around because I was taught to clean after my self as a child
how can I break this bad habit of his since he doesn't want the schedule, and he can't notice social cues
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