Conflicted about not breastfeeding anymore

I know it's a difficult thing for many mums, but would love to hear from others who have experienced this.

For context:
- My son is now 6 months old and took to breastfeeding as soon as he was born
- Started mixed feeding around 3-4 weeks for a few reasons
- I went through many ups and downs with BF. At times it was so wonderful, but a lot of the time it was unpleasant for both of us (baby with significant tongue tie, oversupply and forceful let-down)
- From about 3-4 months he was mainly bottle feeding in the day and I was BF overnight and he was waking up every 2 hours or less to feed
- Just recently we've started giving him a bottle overnight and he only has 2 feeds between 7pm-7am
- I planned to keep pumping so we can give him expressed milk but the days just fly by and when I've tried to pump recently it's obvious my milk supply is dwindling

Even though formula is so much better for us in every practical way (and I don't really miss BF at all) I feel sad about not being able to anymore. I've been trying to increase my supply a bit, but also wondering if I'm just holding onto the idea of being able to BF rather than it having any practical benefit.

Partially needed to vent, but also keen to hear from anyone who's been in a similar situation?

Thanks 🙏

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Hey mama! I breastfed my son until he was about 3 weeks old. We thought he was colic just turned out he was lactose intolerant so we saw his doctor and she prescribed formula for allergies colic and lactose intolerance. I was heartbroken and I realized I couldn’t breastfeed my baby anymore but it didn’t hurt our bond which was my main fear!
My son is 7 months old and thriving! He’s also eating purées and baby oatmeal cereal obvs no milk in it. And our bond is stronger than ever I would say!
He does wake up sometimes in the middle of the night but it’s because our room is dry even with two humidifiers and an air purifier.
My main thing I would say to you is only you know when you are ready to stop breastfeeding. And when you are ready you may be emotional and that is completely normal! But if you want to keep breastfeeding and need more supply I use to eat the lactation cookies baby boonies and I would pump 400ml every two hours ❤️hope this helps

It is really difficult to find time to pump and when I was trying to fit it in during the day I felt I was missing out on playing with my baby which would probably be better for him than the milk.
If it works for you just to breastfeed a couple of times overnight and give formula during the day then there’s no reason for you to change anything 😊

that's such a great point. The main reason I don't pump is because I'm busy with him in other ways. Thank you!

thank you 💚 it's reassuring to hear. And I think bub is thriving more on formula. It's keeping him fuller so he's able to go about his day and explore the world without getting upset every few hours (also depending on what I've eaten!)

I gave up at week 5.
Bubba wouldnt latch so had to exclusively pump
All the pumping got me so down i left like a milked cow,i weighed up my mental health & switched to formula & best thing i done for myself personally.
I'm proud i gave it a good go tho and had quite a stash in the freezer so she didnt finish booby milk really until over 2 months
I see my babys thriving on formula.
Dont put pressure on urself just take it day by day

thanks for this. You're right about giving it a go - that's the main thing. And mental health was a huge factor for me too. Being well for your baby is way more important than worrying about what you didn't do.

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How to help my husband understand why I'd like to breastfeed

My husband is very supportive, but he is also someone who wants to make things as easy and as stress free as possible.

With our first child, I tried to breastfeed, but due to my own medical issues postpartum, baby and I were separated a lot and my milk dried up so quickly. We introduced formula around 2 weeks PP, and I tried pumping as much as I could, but it just lead to nothing. It was heartbreaking. It definitely ruined a lot of those early weeks for me, I was wrecked with guilt and sadness. I cried every day and felt like such a failure.

Now my son is a healthy, happy 2 year old and I eventually came to terms with formula feeding him. He was quite content with the first formula we tried, never had feeding or gas issues etc, so it felt like a much easier option.

Obviously my husband witnessed all of this and now we're expecting our second baby, he sort of assumed we'd just go straight to formula.

I told him pretty early that I'd like to try breastfeeding again, and although I won't be putting so much pressure on myself this time, I've also done more research and I'm more prepared for the hard times that might come up in the early days/weeks, and I'm trying to prepare for any complications.

He's very supportive and says it's totally up to me and hasn't tried to sway me either way, but I do get a feeling the moment things get difficult PP he will automatically be buying formula. And he won't mean it in a bad way, he'll just be trying to make things easier for me and take off the pressure. He won't understand that it's unhelpful.

His thinking is that as long as baby is fed that's all that matters, and I agree mostly! But I also understand how beneficial breastfeeding can be and want to give it all my effort if I'm able!

So I guess I'm asking, are there any good resources I could send him to read? Preferably nothing too long/wordy, but something that explains the benefits and how to best support me during this time too? (Also something preferably from the UK as I know guidance can differ depending on country)