dont know what to

my kids and i are living in constant fear of my so. he has bipolar. he just recently got a new doctor and is seeking treatment for it, but until they get his meds situated the kids and myself are constantly afraid of doing something to upset him. he was in a bad mood bc i (25f, 102lb) couldn’t push his motorcycle with him (135lb) on it fast enough for it to jump start. our 1 year went to get into the drawers she’s not allowed in and he spanked her so hard that even with a diaper on he left hand prints. he broke our front door and bedroom from slamming them. idk if i should take the kids and leave bc he’ll stop getting treatment if i do or if i should stay bc they’ll eventually get his meds right and its rare for him to have a manic episode

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Leave. That is abuse. Mental health dosent allow someone to be abusive.

Leave you don't want to end up in hospital. Leave protect your child. If you don't take her out of this situation and social services were to get involved you may end up loosing her(this happened to one of my sisters who was in abusive relationship and luckly my dad and his partner could take them on other wise they would of got lost in foster system) I don't want to scare you but I don't want to see anyone else loose a child or a child loose their mum because the partner has put her in hospital x

Your children will thank you for leaving

I would absolutely leave. If someone and I mean anyone laid a hand on my daughter I wouldn’t put them in that situation again. You are not responsible for him receiving the help he needs, he is a grown man with responsibilities. You have a duty to keep you and your children.

As someone who has A LOT of empathy and compassion for people struggling with mental illness, has worked in inpatient psych setting, and has been assulted and injured by people in crisis, you DO NOT get to excuse their behavior because of their illness.

He 100% needs help, but that isn't on you. It is more damaging and traumatic to you and your children, and more likely to cause long term mental health issues with your children to live in an environment of fear.

Also there is something else going on if it is a matter of his mood flipping like a switch. That isn't bi-polar. That seems more like a trauma response or a personality disorder which will only be adjusted by therapy and him wanting to work hard at it. Meds can help but they aren't going to change it.

Depending on the level of fear/violence I would recommend removing the children from the environment and having third party supervised visits. Either his parents or a sibling and ideally in public places like a park or something.

This is obviously an extreme response, but if you don't feel safe in your house then it isn't a home, and no child should be afraid of their parent.

in our community

AITA

In the uk there is an outbreak of meningitis, in a specific area mainly. My BD has family from that area and decided to go and meet up with them, I said if he does then he cannot have contact with the kids for 7-10 days after incase he picks anything up. Am I being over dramatic? I reallyyy don’t want my young kids getting anything serious

Baby clothes

Just out of curiosity, why do parents love zipper onesies?

Don’t get me wrong, I tried zipper ones it’s easy to zip in and out when putting it on the first time and taking it out, but I find it difficult when changing diapers especially when baby is asleep.

I prefer those kimono style buttons where it’s easy to button or too down button with crotch snaps.

Is everyone thinking the same or different? Lol

This might rattle some people

Ok, this might get a bit long, and a bit bumpy, so get comfy and buckle up.

So about a week or 2 ago, there was a post on here regarding sleepovers. Not letting their child go to them as you can't trust who'll be at the house etc.

Now, given recent incidents in nurseries and schools, plus my own experience back in the 90s, I am more concerned about sending my child to nursery and later school than I am to a friend's house for a sleep over.

The other day a man was jailed for abusing children at the nursery he worked at. A woman has been arrested for sleeping with an underage boy and then getting pregnant by a different underage boy while on bail for the first offence.

Young girls and boys get sexually harassed and bullied when at school, not all of them. But more than you think. And not just by other kids, but by adults who we as parents are trusting to look after our kids.

A sleepover, is a more controlled environment, with only a handful of people coming into contact with your child. A school, a club etc there can be 100s of people coming into contact with your child.

I was targeted at 7 years old by the owner of a prominent private school. Thankfully, I wasn't SA'd. In year 5 of primary school, I started to develop early, I was harassed by the boys and teachers made remarks about how my uniform didn't fit right, always "adjusting it" around my chest and legs.

Years 7-9 of secondary school were hell. But it was all under the guise of "we're just messing around". A teacher twanging my exposed bra strap (none uniform day) is not "messing around".

Boys pinning me down trying to rip open my shirt to see my breasts.

I fear for my daughter. I hope she takes after my father's family, flat chested.

We need to educate all our children, what is acceptable behaviour. And to come to us, as their parents should ANYTHING happen.

At this point I’m not enjoying motherhood

My 22 month old is horrendous at the moment🫣 biting, hitting, pushing, pulling and shoving not only adults but children he also wants what other children have and will just snatch it away from them.

We repeat ‘nice hands’ ‘be gentle’ ‘let’s share’ etc

But how do I make him understand what he’s doing isn’t very nice? At the end of the day I feel like I’ve just been saying his name all day and nothing else.

What can I do?

Car seat

No idea which car seat to get next. Please hit me with your recommendations, 1year+ (preferably rear facing or 360). Thank you 🫶🏻

Dummy

My baby has had a dummy since about 2 weeks old (now 5 months) and over the course of the last month we weaned her off it during the day only for naps and night (which was fine) and then 5 days took it completely away during the day.

The first day no dummy was fine, the second bit rougher. But now it feels impossible she just moans and cries all the time it takes ages for her to go down to sleep (she’s always been an amazing sleeper)

I thought it was meant to get better as time went on not worse. I’m at my wits end I dunno what to do.

Currently typing this as she screams uncontrollably in the car and I cry with her cos I can’t do anything.