Issues Pumping Vent…

So I’ve been pumping for about a week now for my daughter, but the pain from a machine has been getting to me and I feel as though if I don’t pump I failed majorly as a mom… My baby girl is currently in NICU getting antibiotics for Group B Streptococcus (I became positive right before I was induced and we didn’t know until her blood culture came back), and I gave the hospital the pumped milk with colostrum in it but I still feel like a failure if I can’t pump and provide milk for her… My family told me that I can’t be feeling like this because I tried and its not for me and that it was okay, but I can’t help but feel this way because I wanted to breastfeed even if she wasn’t latched to my own breast.. This is my first child, and I just feel so horrible that I can’t just suck it up when it gets painful and keep pumping… I’ve been crying on and off for about half an hour now because I feel this way…

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Are you using the proper size for the flanges? If it hurts it could be its too small or maybe the pressure is too high. Also drink lots of water to help your milk supply. Nipple balm is also a life saver. Don't worry mama if you've tried your best. A fed baby is all that matters.

Even when the pressure is lower it hurts… the tube section to place the nipple into is a decent size (about the size of a nickel in diameter).. I’ve adjusted everything I can and it still hurts like hell, to the point of where I haven’t gotten on a proper schedule for pumping because of the fear of the pain..

Ask nicu staff for help measuring nipple for flange size (the section where it sucks up your nipple)

I know they're there for babies but they're there for you too and will know where to get you help with it

A lactation consultant can help you with any issue you have pumping. If you are still at the hospital they should have one on staff, otherwise you can ask them for a referral to find one. Also you should have someone keep an eye on your mental health. It’s really hard mentally early on.

Sounds like you may need a flange insert. There are printable flange rulers online. When you find your size, add 1-2 mm to it and that’s your flange size. You can buy inserts for you’d current flange. Also, increase your water and food intake. It takes a while for your milk to come in.

I tried breastfeeding for the first 3 days and she wasn’t latching and it was stressing me out, to the point where she had 1 feed in 24 hours. I felt like a failure and was horrified my little girl wasn’t being fed, so moved to pumping and giving through a bottle. I managed that for 1 week before my supply started to dry up because of stress and lack of self care. So I moved onto formula because at the end of the day, our little ones being FED is best.
You’ve tried, and clearly trying your absolute best if you’re hurting yourself to do what you think is right by your little one. Please don’t be hard on yourself, reach out to whoever you need to if you’re adamant on carrying on with the pumping but also know that you’re doing a great job regardless because you care ❤️

100% agree to get yourself correctly sized not only for comfort but having the right size will help with effective milk removal. Also consider using some type of lubricant , whether it's a specific pumping spray or oils like olive or coconut to help reduce any friction.

Make sure you're taking care of yourself between pumps with a nipple cream or balm , trust me pumping with already sore nipples is horrible...

in our community

AITA

In the uk there is an outbreak of meningitis, in a specific area mainly. My BD has family from that area and decided to go and meet up with them, I said if he does then he cannot have contact with the kids for 7-10 days after incase he picks anything up. Am I being over dramatic? I reallyyy don’t want my young kids getting anything serious

Baby clothes

Just out of curiosity, why do parents love zipper onesies?

Don’t get me wrong, I tried zipper ones it’s easy to zip in and out when putting it on the first time and taking it out, but I find it difficult when changing diapers especially when baby is asleep.

I prefer those kimono style buttons where it’s easy to button or too down button with crotch snaps.

Is everyone thinking the same or different? Lol

This might rattle some people

Ok, this might get a bit long, and a bit bumpy, so get comfy and buckle up.

So about a week or 2 ago, there was a post on here regarding sleepovers. Not letting their child go to them as you can't trust who'll be at the house etc.

Now, given recent incidents in nurseries and schools, plus my own experience back in the 90s, I am more concerned about sending my child to nursery and later school than I am to a friend's house for a sleep over.

The other day a man was jailed for abusing children at the nursery he worked at. A woman has been arrested for sleeping with an underage boy and then getting pregnant by a different underage boy while on bail for the first offence.

Young girls and boys get sexually harassed and bullied when at school, not all of them. But more than you think. And not just by other kids, but by adults who we as parents are trusting to look after our kids.

A sleepover, is a more controlled environment, with only a handful of people coming into contact with your child. A school, a club etc there can be 100s of people coming into contact with your child.

I was targeted at 7 years old by the owner of a prominent private school. Thankfully, I wasn't SA'd. In year 5 of primary school, I started to develop early, I was harassed by the boys and teachers made remarks about how my uniform didn't fit right, always "adjusting it" around my chest and legs.

Years 7-9 of secondary school were hell. But it was all under the guise of "we're just messing around". A teacher twanging my exposed bra strap (none uniform day) is not "messing around".

Boys pinning me down trying to rip open my shirt to see my breasts.

I fear for my daughter. I hope she takes after my father's family, flat chested.

We need to educate all our children, what is acceptable behaviour. And to come to us, as their parents should ANYTHING happen.

At this point I’m not enjoying motherhood

My 22 month old is horrendous at the moment🫣 biting, hitting, pushing, pulling and shoving not only adults but children he also wants what other children have and will just snatch it away from them.

We repeat ‘nice hands’ ‘be gentle’ ‘let’s share’ etc

But how do I make him understand what he’s doing isn’t very nice? At the end of the day I feel like I’ve just been saying his name all day and nothing else.

What can I do?

Car seat

No idea which car seat to get next. Please hit me with your recommendations, 1year+ (preferably rear facing or 360). Thank you 🫶🏻

Dummy

My baby has had a dummy since about 2 weeks old (now 5 months) and over the course of the last month we weaned her off it during the day only for naps and night (which was fine) and then 5 days took it completely away during the day.

The first day no dummy was fine, the second bit rougher. But now it feels impossible she just moans and cries all the time it takes ages for her to go down to sleep (she’s always been an amazing sleeper)

I thought it was meant to get better as time went on not worse. I’m at my wits end I dunno what to do.

Currently typing this as she screams uncontrollably in the car and I cry with her cos I can’t do anything.