Am I the asshole?

I took a nap while my baby (3 months) was napping because I was soooo tired. I exclusively pump and bottle feed so I’m up most of the night either with her or pumping. My husband has started a new education so he’s home instead of working. He used to be home most of the day to help me. I wake up from my nap and when I walked out, nothing was done at all and he was sitting on his computer playing a game. I asked if he had anything in mind for dinner because it didn’t look like it (it’s 5pm), and he said no and continued playing the game. I asked if he could start on something or why did didn’t, because I would have for him had roles been reversed and he turned off his laptop and started making a whole 5 course meal! Keep in mind I’ve only been awake less than five minutes and I only woke up because my daughter woke up. She’s crying in the crib and now he’s cooking. He asked me to look after her, which is fine, I love her, but the reason I took a nap was because I was overstimulated and the second I’ve woken up here I am again getting thrown into another overstimulating situation. I’m evidently exhausted, and instead of getting takeout, or even starting on dinner earlier, he’s acting like I’m the asshole for asking why he didn’t make anything. I feel like I’m rambling, but I need a break from motherhood and no family or friends live close by. I feel like it’s just a lot lately with the sleepless nights and him being busy all the time. I don’t know how to approach the situation either.

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no you are not! you’re exhausted mama! and that’s normal and okay. I would sit down with dad and have a conversation with him on what you need and when you need it. also a “what you need from partner” on both sides. I did that with my partner and it helped. he has to understand what you’re going through. also he can cook earlier or order takeout / clean up the house and then play the game after. or stop playing the game to comfort your baby because you’re sleeping and need it.

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thank you! I appreciate that very much. We talked things out and it’s definitely a communication issue. I love him sooo much, but it’s so hard sometimes 🥲

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Divorced at 5 months PP

My husband just divorced me yesterday.

I'm 5 months post partum and I feel like complete shit. I literally can't stop crying and I don't feel like eating and this whole week my milk supply has gone down due to stress and not eating. What helps with milk supply?

The divorce- on Monday at 5am me and my husband had a small argument on text. It was regarding him not catering to my love language. I sent him a video on how women shouldn't have to ask and how laziness can kill a relationship. We've had many arguments regarding this prior about him not catering to my love language and he doesn't buy me flowers or doesn't think of me. Anyways this night, he text me saying he doesn't do Mother's Day and all that, he doesn't want to buy me flowers because my sisters buy me flowers and he can't be arsed with my moods. He said I've not been his peace and said he's done.
I replied "okay. All I want is for you to appreciate me and love me as your wife and mother of your child. I'm not pushing you away, I'm begging you to love me etc etc. I'm done too."

I come home from my errands that morning and he's upped and left. He took all of his belongings, clothes, drawer, tv- everything.

He didn't ring or text me or anything.

The property is in my name and as he left and didn't leave the key, I changed the locks the next day. I feel this is what pushed him over the edge.

He officially divorced me on Saturday.
I'm 5 months post partum and I have a 5 year old from my ex partner too.

I just want to talk about it with someone that's not biased. Was I asking for too much? I feel he just didn't want to be with me anymore and used this as an excuse? Or is that me overthinking....
Input would be nice xoxo

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Partner is giving me the silent treatment

So I was struggling with my postpartum anxiety bad yesterday. My partner and I was out for drinks with family. He kept making jokes about treating me a bit shit.
Which no one thought was funny. I am usually quite patient about him using me as his jokes, but yesterday it hurt.

When we got home I told him it made me feel disrespected. Now he is giving me the cold fat shoulder?! What do I do ?

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wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

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FTM

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worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
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Long story short - found out 2 months ago my partner of almost 10 years has slept with two girls, one of which he’s been seeing for 8 months - during this time I was pregnant with our third child and gave birth. (She had an abortion)
I found out, he cut all ties (still works with her)
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Sick of feeling this rubbish, also 5 month pp so hormones/confidence is in pieces😣😣😣

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