Hey mums I’m currently 5 weeks postpartum and experiencing thoughts of suicide with almost everything I over think.
Almost everything I do triggers me and I’m scared that I’ll fall into deep ppd I’ve had a hard pregnancy being alone and thought maybe once the baby comes along these thoughts will subside however they haven’t at all. I love my child however I don’t have a connection to them I hardly want to eat or drink anything even though I’m breastfeeding I like doing it but I hate caring for myself I feel as though I’ve made the biggest mistake bring my child into this world and doing it alone as their father wants nothing to do with us…
As much as I thought this wouldn’t affect me as much as it does now but I’m thinking long term the financial consequences of my decision to follow through having my child them wanting to know their father in the future ect
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Hey,
I don’t know where about you’re located however if you’re UK based I’d really really encourage you to call HOPELINE247 (08000684141). It’s a helpline staffed by fully trained advisers rather than volunteers and they regularly receive called from new mums and can work with you to help keep you safe and give you an open and non judgemental space to talk.
Sending you my best wishes and just want you to know reaching out is so incredibly powerful of you.🩷

Ppd is real. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Please reach out to get support and help. I have been through this and I know where you're coming from. The hormonal drop postpartum is the equivalent of going from taking 100 birth control pills a day to ZERO by day 3 postpartum.
That drop is the largest hormone shift in the shortest amount of time in any human life cycle. I'm attaching a resource that might help you in long term. Stay strong mama!❤️
www.getsoulside.com