Are some children just born bad?

Maybe she’s a narcissist?(I say because you mention her targeting the weaker) I presume that’s something people are just born with 🤷🏼‍♀️

yeah who knows, it's just so unsettling I'm trying to process it and make sense of it all as my little one who's really sweet natured gets attacked. The only thing I can think of is she's just born wrong?

I don’t think people are born bad, and that’s a terrible way to look at a child. Everything we experience from birth shapes who we are, good or bad. Children with aggression issues can benefit from play therapy and very clear rules. Aggression like that can often stem from a lack of stability. Please don’t make assumptions like this and if anything find a kind way to suggest play therapy.

It could be that she has so little social intelligence or that the parents don't correct her when she has that antisocial behavior. Do the parents explain to her that she shouldn't harm the others? Do the parents teach some limits to her? We are all animals, and through the culture and education for living in civilization is that we learn to relate with others properly.
Antisocial transtorn has genetic and ambient factors, child mistreatment or abuse contributes to developing it. Also, it happens the same with psychopathic traits. But most of the time when a child is aggressive it is because the parents don't teach limits and to deal with frustration.

She’s two years old. She is too young to understand what she is doing or to have developed empathy & it feels very harsh of you to write a small child off as “born wrong”. Also you have no idea whether she perceives other children as weaker - that seems like your own mature mindset talking, which is beyond the scope of a toddler! Aggressive behaviour is actually very common in that age group as they are still learning boundaries, regulating their emotions, behaviour control etc.

She’s two they are rough and have no impulse control will you call your own child a bad child born wrong when they are two and have normal aggressive two year old behaviors lol.

exactly! hitting is normal even for older kids. they literally need to be taught how to handle the feelings that lead to hitting/throwing/ etc. How do they know somethings bad if they have never learned it’s bad? Empathy doesn’t show up until they’re almost three!

No. She’s only 2. Almost all toddlers are selfish dictators. As long as she is being raised in a loving kind home and taught to respect herself and others, this is just a small blip. If you’re concerned I would ask her parents about it, if you’re good friends.

Could be autism or another disorder

The OP is asking a question not making a statement. It was actually a topic of debate when I did sociology a level. I don’t know why they are being attacked 🤷🏻‍♀️

Sounds like a b personality disorder. There's 1 billion people in the world with it. Highly genetic.

I agree it’s a fair question to ask in my opinion. There are many things that people are born with parts of our personality’s etc and there are psychopaths who have had wonderful childhoods/parents but are still psychopaths because they were simply born that way. All 2 year olds can and will push boundaries, explore behaviours and hurt others without understanding the consequences but that doesnt mean this isn’t a fair question and it’s not fair for the amount of negative responses.

I don’t think the post is getting negative responses. It’s just that most of the people on this app are parents & aware that this is not unusual behaviour for a toddler. If anything the original post is negative, as it suggests that the child was born some kind of evil devil, purely for acting in a way that is super common for the age group.

Maybe traits are innate, maybe not. But IMO you won't know until they're older, way older than 2, when they've had empathy and right and wrong shown to them many times but still try to cause pain to living things. They're a reflection of the parents, you didn't mention how they tackle these situations... is it possible they're not present enough?

I'm asking the question actually not purely branding her. Let's also remember this is anonymous and has no way of getting back to said child or friend. I'm trying to process her behaviour as it's been incessant attacks from her child to my own and other friends, who in no way provokes her. When I say weaker I had inarticulated younger and less confident. That's not an assumption either, that's fact. It is extremely odd and confusing to observe aggression from a child where ZERO trigger is being provided and where the child delights in causing pain and harm to others out of nowhere. I've seen aggression from toddlers and understand how normal it can be, as someone who's observed this behaviour (and you being someone who hasnt) I'm telling you, it is not normal. As others have explained to me, you could have worded your response in a way to me that wasn't so self righteous

read my response to Emily, it's not either purely just hitting... it's beyond that

Emily... I have friends who have aggressive kids and it's normal. I get that, I'm not a complete novice, I was a kid myself that bit 3 kids when I was little. What I'm observing in this child IS NOT NORMAL, these are unprovoked attacks with no stimulus, she deliberately targets kids she knows won't retaliate and she will most often do it when she thinks other parents aren't watching, it's premeditated and completely unprovoked. Then there is the delight on her face when the child shows pain or cries, we literally have to wrestle her off thr attacked child because she's in this bizarre delighted trance and she won't let go, when I say let go it's because she has her nails dug into thier face

hi Erin, please see response to Emily... also I didn't label anyone did I, it was a question from a parent who's emotionally exhausted and trying to process a situation that is very distressing. I love the chids mum she's a dear friend and I'm trying to understand

I wasn’t being self righteous, I’m sorry you took it that way. You asked a question - are some children born bad. You also said that you thought your friends child was just ‘born wrong’. I was responding & giving my opinion. If you have serious concerns then it would be more constructive to discuss it properly with her parents or look into avenues of help, support, play therapy etc (even something as basic as GP or health visitor advice) rather than just deciding that the child has something irrevocably wrong with them at the age of two.

I said the only thing I can think of is she born wrong with a question mark, because as i described the behaviour is extreme. I also know how fantastic and kind her parents are. You do know being a psychopath has been shown to be genetic as well as environmental right? People really can be born 'bad' so to speak

sorry I know I'm flooding you with responses but it's irked me a little ha. Anyway saw this and thought it interesting as I wasn't aware it could be as young as 2 -  2016 study conducted by researchers at the University of Michigan suggests early signs of psychopathy can be seen in children as young as 2 years old. Even at this age, they show differences in empathy and conscience.

Hmmm looks like even at the tender age of 2 you actually can show signs of being 'born wrong' and let's not skirt around it and pretend it's all totally okay to be a psychopath... it's sad and I'm sorry if by reading this people are triggered by thier own child's behaviour as it may fit what I've described but the science is clearly saying psychopathic traits can be evident at as young (and even younger) as 2.

Oh I also have suggested her child see a behavioural expert, I've also done everything I can to help her child understand as well as her mother that her behaviour is wrong. Nothing is working

I’m not 100% sure why you are so defensive & seem specifically offended by my comments, to the point that have edited the original post multiple times as well as your replies to me etc. Many other people have commented on the post so I apologise if I alone specifically offended you with my opinion. Hope your friend & their child get the support they need.

edited it to add further information to give more context and insight. Not really offended by you. I'm torn by how I feel, being horrified and honestly, disgusted by a 2 year old is a nice thing to sit with, especially when the 2 year old belongs to someone you love and care about. It's very conflicting, if this child's behaviour continues to keep getting worse I will probably have to end the friendship as I can't have my child around her as she's starting to show signs of fearfulness around others now. It's a terrible situation

Honestly with all the added context and how much her child is stressing you and and stressing your little one out as she’s showing signs of fear I’d honestly end the friendship for your own mental well being and your babies safety as well. If you’ve tried to tell her parents and suggested behavior experts and they aren’t doing anything to help their little then that’s no longer on you and idk what else you could do to help them.