MIL telling ppl we're pregnant, now I have to go see her, help

just personally wouldn’t tell her anything.
i have to do the same with my MIL and my partner respects that cus i’ve got disrespected too many times.
just don’t let her ruin your pregnancy journey x

Do we have the same mil😂😂 she’s not really my mil bc we aren’t married but we told my in-laws around 10/11 weeks I believe and next thing I knew my nana sent me a message saying that my mil was telling a ton of people at a football game. So my nana told her “I don’t think hope wants everyone to know yet since she hasn’t posted it, maybe keep it to yourself” mil told her that it was fine if she tells people. I regret telling mil before telling my dad (I tried meeting up with him for weeks to tell him😂) because I had a gut feeling she’d tell everyone (like she did) and it’d get back to my dad before I could tell him. She loves making everyone else’s news about her.
In-laws lived with us till I was 7 months and I was like they aren’t leaving so we gotta leave type situation. But I avoided her most of the time, I was a CNA that worked nights and so I’d work all night and sleep all day. I’d even pick up other shifts because I dreaded coming home and seeing her.

Do you want to go on the vacation? If you don't want to go, it's OK not to. You are pregnant and not feeling well. Those are good enough reasons.

Telling others without your permission is definitely disrespectful, and it is a big deal. Accusing you of trying to keep her son away from her also sounds like a huge toxicity red flag. I'm very glad your partner agrees and is on your side.

If you decide you want to go, remember that your in laws probably see that she's toxic. If I'm right about that, her gossip is probably just going to make her look bad, especially if you're on the vacation obviously being nice to her other children and their significant others. They will see who's actually nice in the end (you) and who is relishing drama (her).

Oof, I’m sorry! My MIL also had issues with boundaries and our final straw was when I specifically asked her to not share about our pregnancy (toddler told her by accident) and a week later, my husband got a call from FIL (they’re divorced) upset because MIL had told everyone and people on FIL side found out before we told them 🤦🏼‍♀️ I hadn’t even told my family yet and strangers were congratulating us because of MIL. Husband sent her a long, heartfelt message explaining how she crossed too many boundaries and that was a big one, she barely responded and was updating her Facebook status instead of caring about what he had to say 😑 Haven’t spoken to her since!

My dad is this person and like others have said, I just don’t tell him anything I’m not ready for everyone in my family to know. He has proven time and time again that it doesn’t matter how many times I ask him not to, HIS “excitement” trumps my request for privacy. So he’s the last to know everything. But that’s the consequence of his behavior 🤷🏽‍♀️ actions have consequences. As far as her gossiping, you can’t control that, unfortunately. Just know it has more to do with an insecurity she has and she’s probably trying to use external validation from other people to make herself feel better.