Telling parents you’re in labour

I’m against this - I don’t want to tell my parents or in-laws (or anyone else) when I go into labour. My mum wouldn’t be able to keep it to herself and I don’t want to be inundated with messages/calls throughout. I want to just tell them when baby has arrived and we know everything is okay. My husband seems to think we ‘have to’ tell our mums?

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I didn't tell anyone I was In labour 2nd time round I announced baby when we was on a ward its your labour you are in charge

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That decision is totally up to you and people need to understand. I told both and only my mom showed up to the hospital right away and MIL came when the baby was born.

You know your people so do what makes both of you comfortable.

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I absolutely wished my partner didn’t tell his family, because they all ended up at the hospital and I only wanted my mum and him there.

I ended up with both our mums, plus his two sisters while I was in full blown labour to then be in tears as I was told I needed to go for a c section.. once baby was here and wheeled into recovery no one wanted to stay. I absolutely wished it was more intimate.

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I didn't tell anyone with my first and the only people who knew for my second were my dad and Bonus mom because they were watching my oldest overnight. You definitely don't need to tell anyone

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Totally your choice. I told my family chat (parents and brothers) when I was in labour and on my way to the hospital. However, all my family live abroad so it’s not like anyone then showed up at the hospital or anything.

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We didn’t tell anybody for our first until he was born. With my second, my brother knew because he was looking after my first while we were in hospital but he can keep a secret

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You don’t have to tell anyone. I went in to labour at 12.30am and gave birth at 9am, we didn’t tell anyone, and even if it was day time I don’t think we would. It was actually so nice to ring people and tell them that they had a grandchild etc as it was a nice surprise for them too.

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It's completly up to you, if you feel like you want your family close you tell them, if you want them to wait you don't. Your husband needs to understand that even though this is the birth of his child too, that it's your moment as you're the one giving birth and you want to do it in a calm, non stressful environment.
If you wanted to, he could handle the message situation and you just focus completly on the birth x

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I didn’t plan to tell anyone but got to 12 days overdue so had to go in and be induced. Luckily got out of being induced but everyone then knew it was because I was having heavy contractions! Luckily they sent me home and I was back by 8pm so then out of visiting hours and then got sent home with baby about half 8 the next morning so they couldn’t physically visit! But they were all awake at 2am noticing we were active on social media etc x

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Our families knew we were at the hospital but not specifically that I was in labour. My husband had my phone and honestly they weren’t looked at until we messaged to say he’d been born. It was a very quick labour though

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We didn’t tell any parents/family first time which was great. Didn’t have a choice second time as we needed one set to watch first child, didn’t tell the other set though

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I wish I didn’t need to tell anyone but we needed my parents to come take care of our dogs 😂 however everyone was very respectful and didn’t come to the hospital until they were invited. I made everyone wait until I was showered, had a meal and had a little rest.

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I won't tell my family. My mother blew up my phone and then my sisters did and then distant family (hadn't spoken to them in over 10yrs) texted me(non have them my#) congratulating me and asking for photos.

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Our son had been born for around 2 hours before we let anyone know we were even in the hospital. It’s definitely a personal choice. Obviously with this pregnancy it will be slightly different as someone needs to have my son but we haven’t chosen our one person yet x

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i told my mom , hubby didn’t tell his mom. just do what you want in the moment

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I didn’t even tell anyone my due date, let alone blow-by-blow updates 😂😂
It was so magical to have quiet time as a new family just floating on cloud nine before we contacted anyone 💖

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I wanted our families to know. My mum passed on the message to them all as mine and my husband didn’t look at our phones. If anything had happened they’d be part of our support bubble regardless. But it may depend what types of families you have xx

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I didn’t tell anyone, my waters broke at 11.30pm and he arrived by 4.47am we then waited till 6am to contact family! This time round may be different as my parents will have to watch my son, unless it happens when he’s at nursery 😅 personally I prefer them not knowing as I know they’d worry like mad wanting updates (understandably) x

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I completely get this and would relate to it. My advice is to do what is best for you especially but of course your husband too. Make sure you set boundaries beforehand - I remember a joke being made to me saying a relative would be waiting in the waiting room (for me to give birth) and partner and I both emphasised that absolutely would not be the case.
We only had immediate family at the hospital and at home for a week or two after the birth. I loved that bubble 🥰

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I told my friends when my contractions started and I was pretty sure I was going into labor.
I didn’t tell my parents or in-laws because they’re dramatic and would want updates. I find labor updates gross. I don’t want to share how far dilated I am with anyone.

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I didn't I sent them an announcement the following day after he arrived.

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Hell no. Do not announce anything without caution for people ignoring your comfort and be careful who you tell and when

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my step dad actually did wait in the waiting room while my mom and best friend were with me until hubby arrived then they all waited together and gave us our space 😂

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I only told my parents and in-laws. That’s how I avoided all the calls/texts lol and even if they did tell people I kept my phone on DND and was focused.

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I had about 4 people in w me labour room and about 10 people in the waiting room. None were MIL or mum 😂 they came a couple hrs later when I was moved to my suite. I did have my sisters and hubby as support in labour, and all their kids and partners and my brother and his gf (the other 10) were in waiting room. They came in and held baby and I took photos and a group shot. It was a big ass celebration lol the midwives were all for it they said it was rare that a labour room had that kind of energy it’s usually chill and quiet

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You don’t have to tell them but I don’t see why you wouldn’t personally. I sent messages to my brother, sister and a few friends to say “it’s go time, will be in touch”. Had a few messages of “any update?” And alike but obviously I didn’t respond and don’t think they expected one. Only sent replies when I was ready and in recovery. I don’t think it’s the norm for people to start harassing labouring mothers, at least not in my circle 😂 but they’re just as excited as you and it’s only natural to want to share the news.

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Is this your first child? I was honestly too tied up to check my phone during the whole time. Lol. I had to focus to get through each contraction

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With my first son we told everyone and i mean EVERYONE. I went in to be induced and was so excited i'd be getting my baby i told all of our family who then told other people so some friends found out who told other people then before i knew it nearly everyone knew. I'm a big ranter too so when stuff wasn't going the way i wanted i ranted on facebook so everyone knew baby was well on his way🤣🤣 It was nice going through it with people as it was awful being induced i spent days just sat in a bed on induction ward waiting for a bed on labour ward to get my waters broke so it was nice not having to hide it from
people that i was there as i'd have been so lonely not being able to speak
to my friends on the phone and stuff. However it got a bit much once i was on labour ward and went quiet i was getting bombarded with phone calls and messages. Then once i went back on social media after my son was born but didn't announce him yet, i was getting call after call as people had obviously guessed

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My mum and dad didn't know with my first, just sent a photo of baby saying he's here.
With my 2nd they knew as they had my little boy.

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I didn’t want to tell anyone until we were on our way to the hospital, but my partner messaged his mum telling her that I was having contractions and we’d be heading off soon. It resulted in her coming round to pick up the dog straight away (even though that could have waited until we were out of the house) and then her coming upstairs to see me in bed while I was contracting 😮‍💨 that was 9 weeks ago, and I’m still not over it

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My husband and I will not be telling anyone that I am in labour 😂 my MIL is great but she would literally bring everyone and their dog to the hospital and we absolutely do not want that and my mum lives 3.5 hours away in my hometown. We just want it to be us two and to let people know when we are ready. The only people we would consider telling is his brother and partner as we have 2 cats that may potentially need seeing to, but I know (or at least really hope 😂) that they’d be able to keep it to themselves. This will almost certainly be our only baby due to fertility issues so we’re being incredibly selfish and trying not to worry about other peoples expectations xx

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Is this normal?

Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

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Thoughts?

your soon to be brother in law (upon inquiry) told you that only a few kids from the family were attending his wedding because they are over the age cut off..

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Alright don’t need any negative Nancy’s telling me not to get my 2yo a tablet so if that’s what your gunna do please don’t participate in my poll.

We’re about to move cross country 3+ day trip and my 2yo and 9m hate the car I’m talking scream their heads off till they are out of their seats. We’ve already changed car seats and it didn’t help so I’d like to at least have one entertained and sit next to baby and try and distract her or put her to sleep. Our new car has tvs but since they are rear faced my 2yo can’t see it.

Debating getting her a tablet or dvd player right now on long car rides I end up giving her my phone because I get so overwhelmed sitting in between both of them screaming and crying.

And yes I do bring different toys I bring snacks I play songs try to distract her other ways but for the sake of not losing my mind on this move I think this is best.

-A very overwhelmed and anxious to move mama 😓

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Thoughts on daycare?? Truly, I am SCARED to be leaving my kid for daycare. I literally do not trust anyone, not even family (they haven’t given me a reason it’s just trust issues on my end, you never know). He’s turning 3 and I’ve been a sahm the whole time but tbh my man doesn’t make enough for us to move out somewhere more calm . We live in a ‘not so safe’ area in LA and I’m just not used to living here so I just want us to give my son a better life and in order to speed up the process I would have to work.. I do lashes at home and I’d be open to take new clients so I wouldn’t have to look for work but I’m just scared to lose my license 😭

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My husband works and does so much for me and my baby girl. However I get annoyed every time he hops on a video game he usually plays for 1-2 hrs if she's still awake and has like 3+hrs of free time once she goes to sleep (i co/contact sleep). The last time I was able to have actual free time was last month when I tried to turn some onesies into shirts for baby girl to sleep in- and I wasn't able to finish them and haven't picked them up since lol. The only free time I get is while she's napping right next to me where I can't move an inch or breathe too deeply or she'll wake up, or when I shower. Crafting used to be my outlet and now if I were ever to tell him that I need to craft I don't even know what I would do or where to start I just sit there and stare.... just losing myself and I'm struggling with it. Does anyone else feel the same way? What do I do?

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