Am I the bitch? MIL edition

Carseat safety is really important, and if you are that picky carseats (which i am too), I would've given her a list of carseats you approve of. She probably thought that she could buy any joie careseat since you had one previously. I would've just communicated better.

Not even a question. She’s the problem end of. You don’t mess with safety she should know better

Driving in a car is the most dangerous thing we do with our kids and we do it almost every day if not every day. You're not overreacting in the slightest. I would just buy the seat you want for her car, take it to her and install it for her. If she thinks the seat she bought is ok "because they can't sell it if it isnt safe," she likely doesn't know how to properly install it either. If she gives you push back, just say "car seat safety is really important to me. Please let me do this my way so I can fully trust in his safety when he is with you."

I told her to look at a joie but let me no which one she likes before she brought, I feel like I couldn't have been any clearer

she had the current one fitted at halfords this morning "done professionally" after I told her to take it bk, when I fitted it per instructions it didn't fit in her car properly n it was super unstable n then the halfords people fitted it and said its suppose to be like that and it's safe. To which I said idc if they said its safe I don't trust it please by a new one and she's still arguing with me. She's doing everything in her power to not to what I ask her😭

Your kid. Your rules. If she won't follow your rules, she won't get your kid alone. Plain and simple. Sounds like she is intentionally being difficult because "back in my day" bullshit. Stand your ground.

Whilst I agree car seat safety is very important and I'm a huge ERF advocate, you can't say R44 seats are unsafe. It's just the old minimum standard. There have always been good and bad seats that pass minimum standards. Being R44 doesn't make it unsafe.

I'm not saying they r unsafe and it's perfectly fine for other people to want to use them but there is a lot the R44 don't test for, like side crashes, neck and head stability and I personally would prefer my baby to be in a car seat tested at the current safety standards which are safer then the R44 standards. However R44 are so outdated that a lot of countries do consider them to not be safe and it is illegal for those car seats to be sold there, and in my opinion if a car seat is banned/illegal in another country it definitely isn't something I would trust with my babies life x

I don't think you're unreasonable at all. I've had similar with my in-laws, although thankfully they took it okay once they understood the importance of a good car seat and how much of a difference there can be. Personally I don't even really consider R44 vs R129 because it's still not a high enough standard imo, I won't buy anything that doesn't get a good score from ADAC/OÄMTC or at least Swedish Plus tested