Fights with partners- advice

I feel like me and my partner fight every weekend. I feel like he doesn’t understand how hard it is to be a breastfeeding mom and that I never have a break.

My family is visiting tomorrow and he wanted to go out riding his motorbike today. I asked him to kindly hold off to the afternoon because I needed him to look after our baby so I can tidy the house for our guest.

If I put baby down, she will cry and I simply can’t get anything done.

He got so angry with me and told me I don’t allow him to do his hobbies, instead of helping he took out all his stuff for the bike and was going to sell them online . Because apparently I have forever banned for having hobbies . 😩😩 then sulking on the sofa all day with red wine . Lovely!

He is generally great with the baby. But I’m tired of fighting all the time, I’m tired of carrying the load , I want to have free time to do my hobbies too. When I need help . I feel like shouldn’t have to fight to get it .

Sorry Big rant !! Any advice ? Anyone else feeling like this?

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Write down all the tasks/chores together and make sure all get divided (breastfeeding being a hugeee labour for you) and that you both get free time to yourselves (although you may have to wait a few months til you get longer periods of time). Why isn't he tidying in advance of the guest? You need to share the responsibilities in the house and for the baby. I hope a serious conversation about how to both get free time, after the chores are done, helps x
Also depending on babies age, have you tried a jumperoo (4m+)?

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Try to be patient I know it’s hard keep trying to work on communication

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Not much advice regarding the arguing side other than he should be pulling his weight and you both should have some time for your hobbies not just him. On the clingy breastfeeding baby side the best thing I found for getting bits done was popping baby in a carrier/sling and doing bits i could with him in there when my partner was at work so that could be worth a shot to at least free up both your hands to get some bits done when you want to

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Is it bad of me to think this or no?

My husband has been abroad for work (1 day and exploring for 1 day) for 2 and a half days which means I’ve had both kids (1 year and 4 year old) for 2 and a half days plus cooking, cleaning, taking them to clubs, bedtimes!
He came home late afternoon and said I’m so tired, I just need to chill. I said can you wash up whilst I sort kids dinner out, he said he’ll do it later which means he won’t do it and I’ll end up doing it so I said no do it now please otherwise I’ll end up doing it and he said well you have been home and I’ve been away so you’ve just been relaxing.
Don’t know what planet he is on but having the kids alone for 2.5 days is not relaxing. I was stressed!

When he was away, I did miss him and wanted him to come back but now he’s back, I want him to go away again😂
Is that bad?

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Post partum dad

I have a 2 month old. A few weeks ago my husband crashed out because he didn't feel like he was getting to bond with her. I started exclusively breastfeeding around that time and honestly didnt see the big deal. Baby and I left for a few days and when we got back home, everything was fine. He was extremely hands-on. He helped with my meals, her bedtime, bath, stories.....for a few weeks it was great. Then he randomly sounds depressed af. He says our lo is better off without him, he wants to sleep all day , he asks me not to watch tv then tried playing a video game. He refused to reply to me when i asked any follow-up questions. Then he woke up our baby trying to race me to the bathroom first thing in the morning . He's doing a weird mix of crying, trying, and giving up. Im starting to feel like I cant handle him not being able to handle life with baby and just want to be alone. Are there resources for men?

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My 2 year old won’t eat nothing but snacks

Is this normal ? He won’t even try anything I eat .. he really only like pizza fries and spaghetti… nuggets and snacks bananas some other fruit but like anything else he won’t eat if try but I don’t want to force him I’m just I feel like bad I mean he isn’t losing weight I breastfeed mostly still

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Really bothered by this

A friend posted this and it really bothers me because that is exactly how she parents her kid, and it's rather unfortunate because when our kids hang out together, her kid has a meltdown at least 5x within an hour. We have know them for years and it's only gotten worse. My kids will concede to hers, because they don't want to see their friend crying, but it sucks because they give up so much of their toys and enjoyment to keep the peace. We aren't hanging out as much anymore but it's rather sad to think she doesn't intervene more in her child tantrums and just let's it slide

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Feeding

My son is coming up to five months and I just started giving him oatmeal and rice cereal. When can you start trying veggies or fruits? I only give him the oatmeal or rice cereal once a day right now which is what the paediatrician had said to do. I’m just curious to when anybody tried anything else with their kids cause my son eats a lot of formula and he’s VERY curious when I eat.

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Shift worker daddies - advice please?

My husband works shifts (6am-6pm days or 6pm-6am nights) so when he’s on shift we either get about an hour or 2 before he goes to work or an hour or 2 when we gets home with him.

I don’t think people who aren’t married/have babies with shift workers fully understand the impact of feeling like a solo parent sometimes.

Does anyone have any advice? I do have parents who can help but I struggle to leave my baby with others as I always feel like they don’t understand the need for tracking wake windows or feeds and our baby will not sleep unless we black out a room or go for a car drive . Everyone seems to think ‘if he’s tired he’ll drop off’ - no he’ll just get overtired and have to then pay for it during his night sleep. So I feel like it’s just easier for me to do it all myself.

When my husbands off work he is great but I do take the mental load of telling him what to do or even reminding him of wake windows etc because he’s not here and forgets routines. He’s also being tested for ADHD currently so there’s that on top of shift work.

Just looking for advice on how to stay sane/keep routines or share loads with shifts workers?

Thank you ❤️

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