My little boy has always held daddy in favour, I’ve always been okay with it of course it stung alittle but the past couple of weeks it’s relentless, whenever dad is at home he has to get him dressed, make his breakfast, brush his teeth,read his bedtime story, it’s even gotten to the point where he’s started being difficult for me at bedtime and wanting his dad, as soon as he wakes up and I get him from his room “I don’t want you I want daddy” and he shuts the door in my face, any time he’s upset or I tell him off “I want daddy I not want you” it’s really starting to hurt my feelings, I’m with him 24/7 so why aren’t I the preferred parent? I have another son who’s 1, he’s a mummy’s boy through and through and I’m petrified they’re both going to just I don’t know forget about me? Not want me? I feel really down about it.
Another thing is how are we supposed to punish our children for bad behaviour? For instance when my sons naughty I will say “no you have to stop doing that or you won’t be able to go to the shop with daddy after nursery” and he will just continue to do it, but he knows that I know it’s his favourite thing to do so I’m torn between sticking to my guns and not letting him and feeling guilty and like ‘no I can’t stop him from doing his favourite thing just because he’s being a toddler’ does that make sense? Like I want to show him actions have consequences but I don’t want to be too harsh? I don’t know, I’m just struggling with things at the moment.
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I think its like good cop bad cop maybe?
..I am seeing this with my boy too, whenever I 'tell him off' or give consequences he shouts for his dad as he thinks he'll get away with it.
Don't be disheartened, As your with them all the. Time they don't think of you as a separate person, its like a one body kind of thing?

Have a look at natural and logical consequences: https://parentingnow.org/natural-versus-logical-consequences/
Your child will probably struggle to connect and regulate their behaviour in relation to a nice thing that is in the future and unconnected to what they’re doing now. I try to go with natural consequences where possible as it’s the most effective way of teaching, but logical consequences work if they are logical!
Example of natural: she keeps standing on the edge of a low chair and I’ve told her to be careful and stop jumping, but she keeps doing it and tumbles off - it’s a short distance but enough to teach her to be careful in future. And for logical: we’re cuddled up in bed reading a book, but she’s excited and getting handsy and hitting out. I ask if she wants to get out of the bed if she won’t stop - she usually stops after that but if she doesn’t I would physically remove myself or her until she calms down.