Emotional regulation

If she let's you touch or hold her while she's having a tantrum try just hugging her until she calms down and then explaining why you corrected her. My son was like that so I just started explaining everything little thing to him. Like we do or don't this because ...

Kids can't learn when their overwhelmed so a reassuring hug or just holding her hand and rubbing it can help calm her down.

I know its so easy to think that, but it's far from true. It's all apart of their development and it's just a phase just keep reminding yourself of that. Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn't know you had and dealing with fears you didn't know existed.


If she let you help her calm down. Try just putting her in her room until she calms down on her own. I know this sounds harsh and I'm only suggesting it because I did it with my son and it still works for him that when he gets upset he just goes to his room to calm down, cry it out and then when he's ready he comes to me and we talk about it.

You're not alone Mama and you're doing amazing!

You regulate her by keeping yourself regulated. Her nervous system takes cues from you. If you are calm, you help her be calm.

I'm not saying this works immediately or that you won't still have moments of emotional dysregulation - she's becoming a toddler, it's going to happen. What you're doing is laying the groundwork to recognize these normal emotions, name, and process them. It won't happen overnight, but the more you practice regulation yourself, the more she will pick up on it. Her brain will slowly wire itself to use ration and reason instead of just reaction, and that will help her become an emotionally regulated child and adult, which is a process that doesn't stop until the age of around 25.

Ive found telling my son what to expect has helped. He understands direction pretty well (throw that in the garbage, let’s go upstairs etc). So I give him a heads up about what we’re going to do and then give him a couple minutes to process/have a couple minutes doing what he’s doing. I let him know we’re going upstairs to change his diaper, going to get out of the bath to put pajamas on and so on. I also let him play in the room for a couple of minutes after bath before the adventure of diaper/lotion/pjs. Maybe its in my head lol but it seems to work. Majority of diaper changes are still a battle though 🤣

my daughter does this, she’s almost 13 months. what i do is sit on the floor so she can come to me if she wants, and i explain to her “i see you want to do (x) but that’s not safe, and it’s mama’s job to keep you safe so i can’t let you do that, we can do (x) instead”. or, we just completely change rooms. if all else fails, i pick her up and turn the sink on and let her splash in the water for a couple minutes, hand her a random object she’s never seen before (safe kitchen items, remotes, a spray bottle of water etc), or pick her up and open the front door and let the air hit her face and just take silly deep breaths. :)