Unexpected- Situationships-Onenightstands

What do I do

My period wasn’t due for six days, but I was having symptoms that I had whenever I was pregnant with my first child so I tested early and got five positive pregnancy test. I had been casually sleeping with a guy who had a vasectomy and then I had a one night stand with someone else about two weeks ago. I told him and he’s begging me to get an abortion, but I could not live with myself if I did that I support that right for other women but me personally it would eat me up inside, knowing I did that. I’ve told him 1 million times I can’t that he doesn’t have to be present. He can just pay child support and disappear or he can be present if he wants I’m totally OK with whatever he wants but he’s been begging me for hours to get an abortion. Am I making a mistake? Should I just live with the guilt? What do I do Because there’s also the one percent chance it’s the man with a vasectomy and if it was his baby he wouldn’t want me to get an abortion. He’s my Situationship and it’s really complicated but me and him really do care about each other so I would prefer if it was his kid but I can’t get a DNA test until eight weeks pregnant is that too late to decide on an abortion if it is the one night stands baby

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1. Can you afford another child and are you mentally and physically ready to be a single parent?

2. Learn from this, you know how babies are made- spare yourself this stress for the future.

3. On his end, his CHOICE was to not wear a condom, he made his bed

4. As someone who has chosen to have an abortion and as someone who has also chosen to go through with a pregnancy- follow your heart. I have ZERO regrets with my abortion- it was the responsible choice. It’s not a baby, it’s a potential baby and I did mourn the potential baby but I wouldn’t take back that abortion ever- I would only choose to be more responsible from the start. For my child that I did choose to have, also zero regrets because I knew I could actually provide for him. You know yourself, do what you can handle. Good luck!

I can afford it as I have a good job making hourly pay and commission working 40-43 hours a week with overtime pay. I have a big support system and I’m already a single mom to my first child as her dad barely sees her. And yes it was a mistake that I won’t do again but even just thinking of getting the abortion is making me so upset I truly feel if I went through with it I would regret it forever

I just feel like everyone is pressuring me into getting one. Even my mom wants me to. She said it’s up to me and she will be there if I don’t but she prefers I do. But I just know my mental health couldn’t handle getting one.

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Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

Advice

Hi everyone! I honestly have 0 social queues when it comes to talking to anyone in general. I definitely have a hard time talking to other women and making new friends. I can 100% relate. I just don’t like the idea of texting or meeting up but when I do I’m like “oh this isn’t bad.” Any advice? I also have a hard time getting comfortable and just feeling judged by other women😅 I’m also 19 so maybe making a change in this now will help in the future making mom friends/friends in general. Thanks in advance!

What do I do

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Family culture difference on money

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