MIL making me feel like I’m not doing enough

These comments are so irritating!! I’m assuming baby is only 3 months? There is no rush for a sensory class and by the sounds of it you are doing amazing doing it at home and taking him out on walks. It’s not easy with a new born let alone a baby with reflux. Some people are so insensitive with their words. I would ignore it, you are honestly doing great. I took my first born to his first sensory class at 5/6 months I believe. When he could sit up and enjoy it.

Only you will know when you and baby are ready to go out to classes, and they are 100% not essential for their development - more of a trend to make money out of parents. However it is nice sometimes to do something different with LO, some classes can be really enjoyable. I have not started anything with my first born until she was 10 weeks old, and looking back, it was nice FOR ME to do something different with her however I don’t think it contributed much or at all to her development at that stage. My MIL has also made those sort of coments, and continues, but it is our choice to not leave LOs with grandparents. We don’t need a break from LOs, we love going out with our girls. It is chaotic going out for dinner with a toddler and newborn, but we wouldn't have it any other way, and we make sure both my parents and my husband's parents know this.
They are our children, we appreciate all the grandparents support, but they are not a toy to handover to keep the grandparents happy.

Can’t you tell her to mind her business? I would. I love my MIL but in a situation like that I would be clear. I’m still pregnant but I would be clear that I don’t want any advice if I don’t ask some. And I’ll grow my son in the way I can and I want to. And I don’t want any comment about I will do it.

I think I took this opportunity to rant a little too 😂

i’ve never met her but i hate her for you. Not to go too far but she sounds like an unsympathetic cow that is far too involved. please remember that your family is your partner and your baby, it only goes beyond that if you want it too. the last thing you need to feel is any sort of pressure that you’re not doing enough. it’s good to be polite but i would lose it with her eventually.

MIL’s need to mind their business. I’ve never taken any of my boys to a sensory class and mine are 14 and 2. 🤣 I don’t even like Mother and Baby groups. I think they are full of chatty women who are two faced and compare materialistic things behind one another’s back. 🤣 I’m sure there’s a lot of lovely women too.

Your child, you do what you want with your baby, when you want. Your recovering aswel as going through PPD, she needs to back off and let you heal. Also, your partner should tell her to back off aswel. I hate people who always want to interfere.

There is no need to do classes when they are this young! It is more for parents to get out of the house, babies honestly don't care! You will do kids stuff for the rest of their childhood, so while they are newborns, take time for yourself to recover and do what you want.

Never took my son to any classes, useless waste of money you can replicate at home.

Can also guarantee a nasty woman like that would never have my child overnight or be alone with them 😂

Also 6% of people better have voted wrong 👊🏻 😂

Ugh tell her to keep her beak out of your business 😂 nothing worse than a MIL that can’t help but share her unwanted and incorrect opinions !

Ugh outrageous. In my opinion baby classes for newborns and little babies like ours are really for our benefit, not theirs. I used to go to classes just to add structure to my week. Everything I did at the classes I could probably have done at home myself. You're not depriving your baby of anything.
Also don't be rushed into sending your baby off for sleepovers if you're not ready.
I really don't like the constant narrative of "you need a break from the kids". My dad says it sometimes and I just say "I don't see my kids as a chore so I don't need a break from them". I know I'm lucky cos both of mine are really chill and easy going (and so am I most of the time).
I think getting out for walks, fresh air and catch ups with friends/you mum are perfect for this age.

I get this all the time too, I have to breathe in and breathe out otherwise I’ll end up saying something else. By mistake (sarcasm) I said in front of her I’m so tired “well you’re a mother I’m sorry what do you expect”

Normally I’m good with a comeback but that shook me. But yes agreed with the ladies she needs to mind her own damn business

Just saying this in case: baby classes are for … parents! Literally your baby does not give one little about being in one of those classes. They are designed for mums and other parents to not feel isolated. Wish I had known this as I put so much pressure on myself to go

Don’t ever feel pressured into your baby sleeping at their house. Everything you’re feeling is normal and valid. YOU make the rules, this is your family, not hers. She has the privilege of you allowing her into the extended family but you make all decisions and she needs to learn that fast

I'm from the NL and non of the babies do classes. And dutch people score academically higher than people in the UK and theyre one of the happiest people in the world.
With my first, i started yoga with her from 7 weeks. With my second, he has tagged along to one of his sisters classes and that was it. Like you, he has reflux so what's the point of having an uncomfortable baby in a baby class? Youre doing great!

Also if it makes you feel better, my first NEVER had a sleep over. We tried once with her cousins but she didn't want to stay. I have only ever been away from her overnight, two night because I gave birth to my second. We also cosleep. I dont need a break from her (well I do during the day as she is testing atm lol but I dont need her to have a sleepover).
Always do what feels right for you and your family!

I eyerolled so hard reading her pass agg comments, you’re doing amazing and she needs to take a step waaay back.

I am not taking my baby to any classes until he’s had all his jabs everyone is different but I don’t feel comfortable exposing him to all the germs before he’s properly vaccinated. You are completely right to feel the way you feel no one should pressure a mum to do anything they don’t want to do. Getting out seeing friends is already a big step at this stage. Also I will not feel comfortable leaving my baby overnight with any family member at this stage your feelings are completely valid.

May I add that I would never leave a baby so young with grandparents even for an hour? My oldest was about to turn to when she spent 30 min with them without us in the house, and I plan to do the same with my now 10 weeks old. I love both my parents and my husbands parents, they are nice people and highly educated, but they are not their parents. You are doing so much and they should be so grateful for being able to stay with LO for an hour or going for walks them.

Just an advice if I may.. what I would definitely never let them do is saying those things in front of LO. Sonner than you think, they will understand everything that is said to them and kids take thins literally and those comments can easily make them feel like they are burden to their parents and will of course ask to stay over with the grandparents. We had the some sort of comments said to LO and we were very clear on the moment that that was inappropriate. I'm just relating so much to this post so much that makes me very angry for you!