How do I explain this clearer??

(For context our son is nearly 3)

So this is mainly an issue for my husband and his parents. Don't get me wrong, our son LOVES his dad and his grandparents, however he can be a bit snappy and impatient with them at times, and says things to them that he would never say to anyone else (such as "go away!")

I've worked out pretty quickly that its because they don't really respect his space and will often not listen to him properly, talk over him/finish his sentences for him, and they will try to give him affection when he doesn't want it or is busy doing something.

I've tried to explain it to my husband as best I can, that it's important to make sure LO feels like he's in charge of his own body in terms of who gives him affection etc, that we can't just kiss and cuddle him all we want because he's cute. The thing is, my son will always come running to me for a cuddle and a kiss, he loves snuggling with me on the couch and holding my hand, and I put it down to the fact that it's on his terms, or I'll ask first. If he says no I just say "okay honey" in a very neutral way (not disappointed, guilt-tripping way like they do!)

Plus whenever we're snuggling on the couch for instance, I'm usually reading or scrolling and he'll be watching something, like it's very passive if that makes sense. Whereas if anyone else snuggles with him they smother him constantly with kisses, keep loving on him, stroking him like a puppy etc, he gets annoyed and doesn't want a snuggle anymore and then they're all disappointed.

I know they're just happy and excited and love him so much, but he's getting to be a bigger kid now and wants his independence, and wants to be heard, and it's important that he knows when he says no thank you that it holds weight and people don't just get to do whatever they want because they 'love him so much'.

Anyways, that turned into a bit of a rant sorry 😅

It also just bugs me that they don't listen to him properly when he talks. He's nearly 3, so his speech is coming along pretty quickly but he still talks like a toddler and sometimes it takes repeating a few times to understand what he means. He's very good at trying to articulate what he's thinking and will often repeat as many times as you ask, but they never do! They just say "oh I'm not sure what he said" and just assume or guess. I know it's a bit silly and maybe I'm being too sensitive but it just bugs me. It's almost as if they think he's just not a proper person yet? 🥲🥲

in our community

Almost 4 year old throwing a fit because she doesn’t want to do something and wants you to do it for her. What do you do?

So my almost 4 year old sometimes has tantrums that last 45 minutes or more. Not super often but more often recently. Today she needed a tissue. I get her one. We sit down to play and she wants another one even though she still has the first. I tell her okay go get one. She has gotten them before and can reach them and the tissues are in the room with us.

She freaks and won’t. Then proceeds to scream and cry and beg me to get her one because she’s “just a baby and cant”. This lasts for 45 minutes. I sit with her and stayed calm and all the things I thought I was supposed to.

But is it normal to last this long? Should I have caved and gotten it? She pulls the baby thing quite often. And does have a 1.5 year old sister. She has always been very strong willed and an emotional baby/toddler/kid.

Is it okay to step in and tell another child not to force hugs or hold my child’s hand if my kid clearly doesn’t want it?

Today I met another mom and her son. Her kid is 2 and mine is 17 months old. Her son kept trying to hold my son’s hand, but my son clearly didn’t want to. He was kind of forcing it and squeezing his hand a lot, and my son looked uncomfortable. The mom didn’t really say anything, and I wanted to say something but i hold myself.

Later they were playing and her son tried to hug my son. Again, my son didn’t want to, but the other kid forced the hug and my son lost his balance and fell really hard on the floor. He hit his head and cried for a long time, and it made me really upset.

The mom said sorry, but she wasn’t really watching her son closely. I also noticed earlier that he tried to push or kick other kids.

Now I feel worried about my son because he hit his head pretty badly, and I also feel guilty that I didn’t say anything to stop it.

How do you handle situations like this? If another child is forcing physical contact (like holding hands or hugging) with your child and the other parent doesn’t step in, what would you say or do?

Struggling today

I am really struggling with small things that will set me off.

For the most part, I'm a super composed, super organised person. I discipline my kids effectively and calmly and try not to shout. My kids are well behaved, healthy and my eldest is a great sleeper , my youngest still wakes at least once a night.

However, with my spouse , anything little will set me on edge

E.g Both kids in bed at 7.30 pm last night. He went out with his friends but baby woke up like 4 times before 11pm so I didn't get much prep done for today. He got up with 3yr old at 7am , giving me time to get ready. When I went down with the baby at 7.30pm , he's shoved the breakfast pots in the sink, not even attempted to empty dishwasher, grabs his breakfast and goes to work.

Now, I know he gave me time to get ready, but if it was the other way round& I'd do the dishwasher, the bottles , put the washing on (which literally just needed stsrt pressing) and feed both kids breakfast.

It's not that he doesn't pull his weight, he does .

It's easier to not get mad when he's not there because then I KNOW I have to do it myself.

Also a container of snacks me and my son had homemade fell out of the freezer and cracked all over the floor and that sent me over the edge and i cried in the car

I just feel like dad gets to play all the time and I feel like I have to do all the boring stuff.

I am not slagging off my spouse, I just want to know does anyone else feel luke this .

Is it part of being a mum?

I ferl lije I have no tolerance for anything not going to plan anymore

I am also going back to work (in a different place) next week and I know I am anxious about that

Potty Training

Hi ladies!

Currently attempting to potty train my 2 year old (1st April Baby).

We’ve done two days so far and day 1 was pretty successful (6/11 wees on the potty) but today I just feel deflated.

She hasn’t initiated any wees herself, I’ve caught 2 mid way through and she’s had 3 wees on the potty when I’ve made her sit down and try. We’ve had 2 accidents possibly 3 cause she said she weed in the bath 🤦🏼‍♀️.

She knows wee and poo goes in the potty, she’s an advanced talker and can explain that she needs to go but she’s started to refuse the potty. I feel like I’ve tried everything! Special books, stickers , activities, games, chocolates, even the language I’ve used and towards the end of the day she just straight up refused to sit on it…

What do I try tomorrow ?

She’s back at nursery on Friday and I wanted to have cracked it before then… we’re not even wearing pants yet!

Feeling jealous

As I walked my 6 year old son into school, I saw fathers dressed and ready for the day taking their kids to school and I felt very jealous. My husband is currently sleeping still and he slept all night on the couch after passing out from drinking 2 pints of tequila yesterday… I wish I had chose a better father for my children, cause the one I chose always chooses alcohol over us.

Hello, has anyone been leaving your little ones yet? I’ve gone out twice briefly. The first time I cried lots! 🙈

I was supposed to be going for lunch with friends on the 18th- few hours and 20 minutes away. I was anxious about that and 50/50 whether I’d bring baby.
But my friend randomly got tickets for a daytime event. It’s a long drive out in the open, no shelter and not pram friendly, with a specific time slot- therefore taking baby would be very tricky! It’s over an hours drive away and would be gone for 4-5 hours.
Torn whether to go. Husband is ‘ok’ with baby, but not great!! Even yesterday he had her and she was grumbling and half crying and he just carried on chatting to her oblivious- so I had to say she’s getting upset can you pick her up. She’s also at a fussy stage of naps and drinking the bottle.
What would you guys do?