Should I force my baby to drink from a bottle?
So my baby’s father and I broke up about 2 to 3 weeks ago. Our son is three months and one week. We are currently starting our custody case so that I can make sure he can’t take my son out of state, which he wants to do. My son is currently refusing to drink a bottle and only wants to nurse. He keeps saying that he wants to take him for the weekend but he hasn’t decided what he wants to do with him yet and I’ve explained that Elias is strictly breast-fed right now and he keeps saying that he’ll get hungry enough and take the bottle. Ive explained to my ex that I am absolutely not letting him take our son for overnight visits. He has colic and the only thing that calms his screams is nursing. My ex will not understand and keeps playing it to his family like I am not allowing him to see his son. Yet he hasn’t asked to see him in 3 weeks. I’ve explained it him if he really wants to leave then it’s his job to build a relationship with Elias. And he has yet to do so. He never helped with Elias while we were together. He changed maybe 4 diapers ( never a poop diaper) didn’t want to give him a bottle when he liked bottles because “Elias fights him” when in reality he just didn’t want to learn how. He stopped helping me with bath time because he wanted to put the babies bath in the bathroom (where it hardly fit) and I would give him baths in the kitchen sink because he actually fits in it. He got mad about that and stopped helping with bath time. He always wants to do it his way and do what he thinks is right even though he has no idea what Elias’s cues are and what he needs. Always handed him off when he started fussing or crying. And he hardly ever held him for longer than a few minutes. I don’t know what to do. I want full custody with visitation for my ex but he wants full custody because I’m “a bad mom” and “he deserves his son” even though I put my entire life, heart, blood, and tears into this baby. He is my whole world. While my ex sat on his phone and never once tried to build a bond with our son. So what do I do? Just let him have weekends and force my baby to starve so he’ll take a bottle? I’m at a loss right now
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I really feel for you but I believe that in situations like this, family courts will take the baby's needs into consideration. If baby is fully breast fed they need to be with mom for obvious reasons. Courts are typically going to respect that I believe because they act in what is in the best interests of the child. His demands to take a breastfed baby from his mother are just unreasonable right now. If he wants to be involved, he has to put in the work himself. Frankly the fact he thinks he can starve a breastfed baby into taking a bottle shows how little he knows about infants, or the damage that not eating can do.
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