Is it me or is it still the hormones?
I feel like me and my husband are drifting more and more apart. Our son just turned one and it seems like we are butting heads more often. For one he still sleeps on the couch. In the beginning he did it so I could sleep inbetween pumps and because the bassinet was in the living room. Then he stayed once we moved him to his own crib as the room is next to the living room and as he says “ this way when he cries only one of us wakes up.” I still hear him from our room when he cries, it’s a one story house. I have asked he come back to our room heck it was the only thing I wanted for my birthday but he hasn’t. Then tonight he made his bottle with 4 ounces of milk and 2 water for only one scoop of formula. I started getting upset bc we just talked about it last night. I’m not comfortable moving up from 2 ounces milk and 4 of water with two formula scoops as he’s not really eating table food. He only has a few bites here and there so I feel he won’t get the nutrients he needs if we move up. My husband says his daycare teachers say we need to get him off bottles. Chill out people he just turned one!! We still have a few months til he has to be off them completely. It just feels like he doesn’t care what I say and just wants to be the “yes man” and do what the teachers say. I just feel so defeated as the mom when he does this.
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I hear you. My husband and I mostly sleep separate too. Our communication has gone down and it’s a conscious effort to remain on the same page. and my pediatrician wanted ne to get mine off the bottle since she was 9 months! She is only 12 months too. She uses sippy cup during the day but we have to use a bottle at night for right now 😫( she still wakes up 2-3 times at night) she’s not eating much table food either but the appetite comes with their growth spirts. I’m sure when she gets another one she will start eating more so we are on whole milk and whatever she decides to eat( I still offer her a variety of foods). Anyways I say all this to say everyone is different and there is no rule book for all of this. We are figuring it out the best we know how right now . Don’t get discouraged.
I’m picking up on a lot of things going on here. And it sounds like you don’t feel that your feelings are unimportant to your husband. I’m sure you’ve tried talking to him about it.
I don’t know if it helps, but I’ve tried to schedule family meetings with my spouse, ideally by letting him know in advance what I want to talk about, (moving into bedroom, weaning from formula) and asking for that to be discussed on a particular day/place. It’s kinda like a date, but also ideally more relaxed and no one feels like the topic was suddenly put upon them.
I think getting more clarity from each of you—-what do you miss about sharing a room. Are there workarounds for that. Any suggestions on how long daycare will give you to transition. Is your child taking the bottle with the changes ok? Are all helpful.
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We started couples counseling. He was super resistant at first but I was honest and said we're not the same people and now we feel like roommates who coparent. It's been exhausting and somewhat of an uphill battle but I'm hoping this helps! I wish you luck!!
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