I go back to work part time on Monday. My best friend will be watching my baby. Today, I went to her house and tagged along for what a normal day would look like for my son while he's with her. We hung out at her house and went to her kid's soccer practice.
I feel guilty saying this because she's so great with my son, but I felt so weird seeing her hold my baby and just knowing that I won't be around. I felt like an outsider and like SHE was the mom. I know this is probably just my anxiety talking, but im scared he's going to like her more than me. Or that he won't miss me. She will literally be spending more daytime hours with him than I will. By the time I'm off work, pick him up, and get home, its basically his bed time.
I feel so heartbroken. Ive been able to tend to his every need since he was born. And now I can't guarantee he will get good quality naps while I'm away. His routine is going to be disrupted. I dont know how im going to even have family dinners together and ensure he gets his meals unless he does those with her as well. Im sobbing just thinking about it.
I know so many moms go back to work so im sorry if this sounds dramatic or something. Im incredibly lucky that I've been able to stay with him for 6 months. Im just not ready.
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Just wanted to say that you’re not being dramatic. It’s such an unnatural feeling to have to leave your very young baby. Every mummy bone in your body will be telling you not to.
I’m so sorry the economy is so shit for parents and that we are not better looked after in this period of life
It’ll get easier, you’ve picked someone you trust to look after baby and you’re going back to work to provide for him.