Can partners actually change??

I have been begging my partner to take me out, Make more effort and be present. He keeps promising but no change I’m sat crying and begging him he says he feels bad but if he felt that bad surely he’ll do something about it. I’ve said I just wanna feel like me all I’m known as since having my daughter is mama and I’m tired of it I’m not noticed for anything I do but he picks up one thing and he wants to be praised I’ve had to sit and name everything I do so he gives me a second and listens. Yet still nothing changes. I’m so exhausted I’m in the house 24/7 with our daughter while he’s in work till 11 at night then will throw on me he’s going for a drink while our baby is still up and fussy then when I shout when I get angry or frustrated I’ll always be the bad guy cause he talks to me in such a patronising way that he things he’s the one who’s done nothing and I’m just crazy I feel like I’m losing my mind. I’m constantly planning everything helping with his family’s special occasions and mine while I get crumbs! Am I over reacting?

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I honestly think what you feel is 100% normal. And husband have to understand we really go through a lot physically and mentally. And we need help!!! Raising a kid should be 2 people jobs 🥹
If the partner keep like this, I would suggest you find a nanny or drop your school to nursery. So at least you have 1 or 2 half days off and treat yourself good

I actually just had to have a talk with my bf for the same reason! I been saying stuff nothing has changed so the other day I sat him down an said how I feel and if it doesn’t change I will leave and he’s been amazing since I just hope it stays ! So maybe have a real good talk with him and if nothing changes ur gonna have to make changes to the relationship

You are not overreacting, I had the same exact problem. Mine even broke our engagement off until we could communicate better and I took out my retirement money to stay home with our baby. It was all a mess. After everything I decided to move in with my mom and she helped so much more. We were supposed to work on our relationship still, turned out he had been cheating for months and the relationship started about 5 weeks after our son was born. It’s not you. I can’t say your partner is cheating, but yes, he would change if he wanted to. He should be helping with the baby, showing you praise the way you show him, loving towards you, and prioritizing you and the baby. He knows what he’s doing. I suggest getting a remote job so you can leave if you decide to. The one thing that frustrates me even now is that I am not financially stable because I left work to take care of our son. Become financially stable and decide what you want. You can try couples counseling and talking first though.

I just did this with my fiancee. It got really bad he turned off his location and left the house when he came home I packed us a bag and went to leave it’s definitely possible for people to change and grow up but it depends on the person they have to be willing to put in the effort to be better not just want to. Maybe you need to sit him down and not threaten to leave but say you’re reaching close to a breaking point you never thought you would being parents together and that you don’t want to leave but things need to get better before you’re pushed to that level of stress

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Has anyone else stayed in a relationship mostly because of the kids? How did you know whether to keep trying or start accepting that it was over?

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