Bf’s kid

She also said she would stab me if I didn’t get her something to drink from the store and her dad brushed it off like it was ok

Smh why do these men don't control their kids, when we talk them vex smh, I also have one but he's 14 and I can not stand the little boy, when I talk to the dad about him all he does is get mad at me because I'm not supposed to talk and we got kids together sometimes I wish he didn't have any kid before mine that's how much I don't like the little boy

I’m just saying kids learn it from someone or somewhere so she might be learning it from the Mom. However, I’m very strict with disciplining my kid and he still disrespectful AF and he watched a show with his cousin and now he tells people he’s gonna kill them when he’s mad. And all you can do is correct it. My son is extremely disrespectful and I’ve I’m consistent with putting him in the corner and telling him that those things are not OK and he still does it. I would just try to talk to him again and say like can we come up with a plan to be consistent with putting her in the corner so she doesn’t think this is OK so she doesn’t run everyone’s life because she can’t be like that when she gets in school next year.

Yeah absolutely not that's a big red flag, and he's raising a monster. I've met people who were raised like that and seeing who they turned out to be.. I don't like being around them for known reasons. Anyways leave that bummmm!!!

I’m sure that’s frustrating for you, or anyone. A big issue with blended families is that the biological parent has to take the lead on discipline and if he’s not taking initiative to teach her how to behave properly that can lead to issues later, but it’s not really your place to step in there. That usually causes more issues.

As for her behavior, for a 4 year old that’s not really out of the norm there…a lot of older siblings (I’m assuming this bf is the baby daddy) regress with behavior and act more baby-like when a new siblings comes to reassure themselves of their bond since babies need lots of attention and they can get jealous. Totally normal. The stabbing thing I doubt there’s any real understanding of the consequences of her actions there since she’s 4; she’s most likely just repeating what she’s heard somewhere, so that’s more if a teaching moment, although the underlying emotion (probably frustration that you’re not buying her something) is real.

I have an almost 8 year old stepson who I’ve been around since he was 5. It truly has gotten worse. He’s disrespected me, hit me and punched me while I was pregnant, etc. it’s gotten to the point where I don’t even want to do anything fun with him and I don’t want him around my son, so he doesn’t grow up to be the same way.

You gotta lay it on the table, either she straightens up and he disciplines her better or you leave. You cannot make him choose between you and his kid, but you can make him choose between disciplining her or letting her get away with everything and you leave

Just also keep in mind besides her age and that this is a huge transition for her, plus I don’t know if her mom is in her ear about anything, but if this is your baby’s sister then how you treat her will have a big effect on your daughters relationship with her sister.

It’s super tough and I hope you can get in the same page with your partner, allow this young girl some grace, and foster good relationships between everyone

Honestly the absolute best way to approach this scenario is to flip the script. What of that were your child and dads gf felt the way you feel. How would you want for them to approach or handle the situation and your child ? Just so that you’re not biased. A lot of times we as moms don’t think we can be, but we are especially when it comes to our kids. Personally, if this is a serious relationship for you as in you’re working towards marriage I would address with both him and the daughter, and mom, I’m not sure what your relationship with her is if you have one, but it would be worth a shot. Sometimes dads DONT care, moms though ? Mom probably deals with that shit and nips it in the bud but by the time they get to dads it’s literally no rule. So they do as they please. I’m dealing with that currently trying to get my BD to maintain the same structure when he has our daughter because my husband and I can see the difference from when she leaves and comes back home EVERYTIME.