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IT'S A POLL WORLD! 🙋🏽‍♀️

Feeling so lost and scared to be a single mum

My child’s father has been quite awful to me. He’s always high, never plans dates, never is intimate with me or compliments me. Never wants to spend time with me. I do all the childcare, cleaning, cooking, grocery shops. He complains when I ask him to hang out with me as he’s rather be out with his friends. He’s a total mamas boy, in the past his mum has made rude comments to me and he’s never once stood up for me or told her to stop. Recently I found out I was pregnant again and I was so hopeful and he forced me to have an abortion. He said if I didn’t I would be a single mum at 26 with two kids. Literally screamed at me to take the pill for it. Still traumatised by that. I found him connecting other women on Instagram and contacting women he used to sleep with. He also was out till 8am two nights before I went into labour (didn’t answer any calls) but left me a voicemail by accident when he pocket dialled me and he was chatting to some women at 6am. I’ve told him time and time again I am done, but he would apologise and I could see he wanted to make an effort and say he will change but it never lasts. I’ve realised he’s been extra distant and cold with me the past few months and he just said he just doesn’t think he can love me like I want him to and he doesn’t think it will work. I suddenly broke down. I’ve been with this person since I was 21. We have a beautiful child together. We live together. And now after all I’ve done to forgive him he said he’s emotionally checked out and will be moving out. Even though I know it’s the right thing why am I so emotional and feel so sad? I’m so scared to be a single mum and for us to end for real even though I know it’s right. Please support I really am scared and I feel too anxious to speak to friends as I know that makes it more real