Partners

My baby boy is 11weeks what’s everyone’s partners like helpful non helpful and what do they do to be helpful

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

Very helpful - I'm 4 months PP and I breastfeed so he's kinda useless during the nights. I know he could give baby a bottle but that involves sterilising, faffing around and I'd have to be up anyway to pump. I may as well just feed the baby directly and get it done in 15-20mins. He works, but he takes care of at least 90% of meals. He goes to the shop because he knows it's easier for him to go rather than me cart a baby there. Always makes me a yoghurt bowl and coffee in the morning regardless if I've been up once or 8 times in the night. He'll sterilise my pump and bottles just incase I need them. He'll give baby girl a bottle if I ask and think nothing of it.

Avatar

My husband does his fair share, I couldn’t ask for a better husband and daddy for our little miracle

Avatar

My partner is amazing. Whilst I'm on maternity leave, I do all the night shifts during the week. At the weekend, we share the load - one of us changes her nappy whilst the other makes her bottle. This morning, he took her on the school run so I could walk the dogs and go out for a run. I couldn't ask for a better partner

Avatar

My husband is amazing. He will do everything. We share the load 50/50 when he isn’t working. He does work from home so he helps out during the day too as his workload allows. For example, he will hold the baby if I need 5/10 minutes while working as long as he isn’t in a meeting or make a bottle etc. He also helps by doing most of the cooking.

Avatar

Mine at the beginning was shocking, I think we both didn’t have a clue, and he was scared of doing something wrong as soon as our little boy got a little bit older he has been amazing that we are expecting our little girl in 2 weeks and I can’t wait to watch him be the most amazing dad 🩷

Avatar

Mine tried his best to be as helpful as possible. He would get my pump for me, bag the milk up, change clothes and nappies. He would take her when I was clearly about to snap (i had really bad PPD and was really struggling). He wasnt the best at knowing when to do stuff (still isnt). Not because he didnt care but his brain just didnt connect the dots. I find it amusing because it annoys him more then it annoys me. I just go having a brain fart moment again? And he goes why didnt i think to do x? Like why? And i just pat his head and say next time? Maybe? Or never laugh and and give him a friendly poke. My husbands not been well mentally either and so his brain isnt always in the moment. I just care that he tries and wants to try and do more.

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Should I speak up

My mother-in-law on multiple occasions has been making comments that I feel like are trying to provoke a response.

Full disclosure, we have always had a great relationship. She is super sweet and understanding but since the baby was born I feel like the lines have gotten mixed. Or maybe I'm just a first-time mom who is overanalyzing everything

First, I've expressed anxiety over going back to work after my maternity leave is up in late June. On two occasions in front of me and once over the phone with my husband, she says something along the lines of “ number of weeks to go or you are going back to work soon right?”

Second, right in front of me she says she's going to take the baby home for a sleepover. Due to my horrible poker face, she quickly backtracks and says “Grandma doesn't make milk like mommy so I guess I'll wait” or “Mommy can come too.”

Lastly, she likes to refer to my lo as her baby on occasion she’ll throw in “Grandma’s baby” but most of the time it's “my baby.” (This one is annoying but the least of my concerns).

So, am I overreacting? Have you experienced anything like it?

Avatar

15

Would you attend a funeral with a baby?

Girls.. help! So my nans brothers funeral is tomorrow and we were only going to go to the wake because who tf brings a baby to the service, let alone the whole days worth of planning for naps and feeds. Yet my nan is driving me crazy keeps pestering me and my mum repeating herself about "oh but can't C(my partner) just wait in the car with R(baby) and then all go to the wake together". Like are you f****** kidding me, its so disrespectful and makes me not even want to go, I'm only going in the first place to be respectful to her, I barely knew him. Now I've just found out that bringing a baby to a funeral/wake is bad luck. So now I don't even want him to go to that. Honestly I've had enough with this bs. What would you do? Would you bring your baby to a wake?

Avatar

16

Help needed please!

Little one has just turned 6 months, has been weaning for a couple of weeks but all of a sudden has turned into a right cranky demon around milk time - he cries any time the bottle goes near his mouth, teeth are sat in the bottom gum but are not making any appearance yet! Do we think he’s teething or could it be something else? Stressed he’s not getting enough milk - can anyone suggest what I could try! Thanks a stressed out mum who wants her boy to love milk again! Xx

Avatar

3

Partners

My baby boy is 11weeks what’s everyone’s partners like helpful non helpful and what do they do to be helpful

Avatar

6

Am I being over sensitive?

I’m pregnant right now and I have a baby under 1. I’m super nervous because my husband really doesn’t help much around the house most days. He says it’s because he’s tired from work. Or if he had too much to drink with his friends. Or tired from golf. Either way there’s always an excuse.

I am a stay at home mom so I understand that is my job and I’m happy to do it. But I also would like to a break especially now that I’m pregnant again. Even when I wasn’t, I never said “i can’t take care of our child because I’m hungover”.

What do I do? I’ve tried talking to him about it and he just keeps saying he needs to make money for us. Truthfully I have no problem spending it so it should all make sense to me. But I’m just annoyed and worried what life will be when I’m a little less mobile from pregnancy or when I have a newborn and a toddler 😭

Avatar

4

Baby father's low self esteem

My children's father seems to have horrible self esteem issues/insecurities. For starters, he's always calling himself fat & broke. (Is he the richest or skinniest, no, but definitely not bad) Then, he is always tired, napping, being lazy. I recently talked to him about this and asked why he allows these behaviors in himself, why he allows himself to overeat, oversleep, prioritize laziness over keeping a clean house, not working out despite having time and a gym membership, not saving money despite making a decent salary. I know it's most likely depression as I deal with it too but what I can't understand is his reasoning for staying in this place, I'm clinically diagnosed but refuse to med & I decided about 10 years ago that I wasn't going to live like a depressed person because I deserve better than that. (took awhile and was done out of survival mostly to avoid homelessness) I know its a self driven reason and I can't force him to make it but I don't know why he won't/ atleast hear me out and let me help him.
Also it's becoming a larger issue day by day because at first it started with him dropping a few tasks and being in a bad mood but now he is really being careless with money, he's overeating to a new point(worried for diabetes), he's napping nearly every single day for hours, not taking care of our kids & pets & not cleaning up after himself. He also tries to "bully" me I guess by calling me names whenever he's in a bad mood and I'm stuck between trying to be a helping hand and just leaving. I know how dark and destructive depression is but I literally cannot force him to have self worth, I also cannot keep "babying" (harsh word sorry but idk how else to describe) him because now I'm seriously doing all his parenting tasks, cleaning up after him in ridiculous ways and just being a punching bag for him tbh.
I started by trying to take tasks off his list but like I said he just keeps finding more things that are too much. Then, I tried forcing him into better habits by cooking healthier, no junk in house, begging him to get outside with us, letting him do whatever whenever he can with his friends. But he sneaks food, will nap and literally scream at me if I try to wake him up. What do I do

Avatar

4

Read more on Peanut